Fearless Love

Learning how to increase love and decrease fear

01/09/2019

1 John 4:11-18 Beloved, if God so loved us, we also must love one another. No one has ever seen God. Yet, if we love one another, God remains in us, and his love is brought to perfection in us. God is love, and whoever remains in love remains in God and God in him. In this is love brought to perfection among us, that we have confidence on the day of judgment because as he is, so are we in this world. There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear because fear has to do with punishment, and so one who fears is not yet perfect in love.

Boys and girls, there are two things that motivate most of our actions: either fear or love. Fear forces us to run away from something, whereas love leads us to run toward something. Here are a few examples. Some of you behave well at Mass because you are afraid of getting in trouble with Mr. Edwards (you run away from him). But others behave properly because they love Mass and want to get the most out of it (you run toward Jesus). I’ll be honest, sometimes fear motivates me to prepare good homilies because I am afraid you will fall asleep otherwise. But love for each of you also motivates me so you might learn something that will help you to be truly happy.

I think the difference between fear and love could be seen in the college football championship between Alabama and Clemson. I bet the Bama players were motivated by fear of Nick Saben (he’s a tough coach), but I suspect many players were moved by love Dabo Sweeney (he’s a compassionate coach). Monday night’s results are evidence that love motivates better than fear by a factor of 44 to 16, the final score. Some of you may have a boyfriend or a girlfriend, and you probably feel both fear and love in that relationship. You love the other person, but you also fear losing them. But the best relationships have much more love and a lot less fear keeping the two people together. If we’re honest, we know we are all motivated by both fear and love, but love is always the better motive.

In the first reading from the first letter of St. John, he explains why love should be stronger motive than fear; indeed it should be our only motive. St. John writes: “There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear because fear has to do with punishment, and so one who fears is not yet perfect in love.” In other words, every Christian has to sort out both fear and love in his or her own heart; what motivates me? Sometimes the fear of going to hell makes us behave like a better Christian than the love of going to heaven, like fear makes you behave better at Mass. Fear of hell is called “imperfect contrition,” whereas love of heaven is called “perfect contrition.” By the way, these are the two reasons Catholics go to confession. Some go to confession because they fear hell; others go to confession because they love heaven. In short, fear is not a bad motive; it’s just that love is the best motive for Christian life.

Boys and girls, as you go through your three years here at Trinity, you will see fear of this school giving way to love of this school. When you arrive here as 7th graders, you feel like the deer in the headlights. Everything is new and different and difficult. You first feel fear. Then, as 8th graders, you start to settle into the routine and you accept the rules, and fear starts to give way to love. You grow to respect and love your teachers, your coaches and your school. By the time you are in 9th grade, hopefully all fear has fallen away and you feel only love for your classmates. Sometimes we wish the 9th graders felt a little more fear around here!

Yesterday, I had the funeral for Keith Glenn, who graduated from Trinity in 1997. He died tragically in a house fire three days after Christmas, on December 28. At the funeral luncheon, a big group of his Trinity classmates sat together and shared stories and talked about the good old days at Trinity. They felt no fear, only love for each other, and especially for Keith. As St. John had predicted, “perfect love drives out all fear.”

What got you out of bed this morning? Was it fear of being late, or your parents yelling at you, or missing class? Or was it love of seeing your friends again and learning something that will help you be happy? Fear is not a bad motive; but love is the best motive.

Praised be Jesus Christ!