Wednesday, March 6, 2024

School of Suffering, Part 3

Exploring the aristocratic nature of voluntary suffering

02/26/2024

We move now from considering the more democratic kind of involuntary suffering (like death) which touches everyone, to the voluntary suffering which we might label more aristocratic because it is embraced by fewer and nobler souls. Aristocracy means rule by the noble few. Surprising as it sounds, some people actually seek suffering, not because they suffer from some mental disorder but because they feel their sacrifices might help restore the proper order in themselves and others. We are, of course, still on the natural, human level of suffering, and not talking about suffering motivated by supernatural faith in Jesus. Voluntary suffering is about being super good, not super holy. We are not yet ready for the high science of Christian suffering. That is, even before the birth of Christ – and even after in some instances of ignorance – some noble souls willingly shouldered suffering for their own personal growth or for the good of others. Therefore, we will explore voluntary suffering under two headings: (1) for personal benefits, and (2) for altruistic purposes.

A common example of personally motivated, voluntary suffering occurs every January first. Many people make New Year’s Resolutions, which typically entail some sacrifice, like diet and exercise. People make their physical health a priority and consequently willingly embrace suffering. Such voluntary suffering is for purely personal gain – no pain, no gain – and all good doctors highly recommend it. My parents, for example, have started a new exercise routine called “chair yoga,” and I occasionally join them. It is low impact yoga, and mostly involves stretching muscles. It may sound easy, but I was sweating after thirty minutes.

But physical fitness does not exhaust all the personal reasons for voluntary suffering; they can also be chosen for fiscal or financial fitness. I am a fan of the Dave Ramsey school of managing money because he advocates delayed gratification rather than immediate gratification. Put simply, save before you spend. I bought one of Dave Ramsey’s books, called The Total Money Makeover. At the bottom of every page is his personal motto: “If you will live like no one else, later you can live like no one else.” That is, most people spend recklessly and save rarely. Dave recommends the opposite approach to money management, namely, save regularly, and spend responsibly. Notice here the motive behind such voluntary sacrifices is purely personal, we might almost say “selfish” in the best sense of selfish as becoming the best version of yourself: disciplined. We are not yet suffering for others (although others may approve of the new you), and still far from suffering for Christ (although divine grace is surely operative whenever we do any good).

Another form of voluntary suffering is altruistic, or embraced for the good of others. The first person who suffers altruistically that should come to everyone’s mind is their own mother. Why? No one would be here if their own mother had not willingly endured the curse of Eve in Gn 3:16, “in pain you shall bring forth children”. By the way, Hispanic mothers regularly refuse to take an epidural shot during labor to avoid any undue risk to their baby or themselves. They willingly endure the full weight of Eve’s curse. But motherly love and concern does not stop at childbirth. Our church secretary has a funny sign on her desk that reads: “’It’s like no one in my family appreciates that I stayed up all night overthinking for them,’ signed, Mom.” The behavior of children causes not only the Virgin Mary’s heart to be pierced by a sword; all loving mom’s hearts are so pierced. Naturally, husbands and fathers also make sacrifices for their families, but we don’t receive the same publicity, which is part of the sacrifice itself. Notice, again, that this form of altruistic suffering is not necessarily motivated by faith in Christ or (obvious) grace – it is not properly supernatural – it is, rather, born from natural instincts and familial love and care.

Another higher level or layer of altruistic, voluntary suffering is patriotic sacrifice embraced for one’s country, especially by joining the military. Archbishop Fulton Sheen, in his autobiography Treasure in Clay, refers to two renowned world leaders who embraced celibacy for others: Mahatma Gandhi, for the sake of the untouchables in India (I’m not sure what Mrs. Gandhi thought about that), and United Nations secretary general Dag Hammerskjöld, for the sake of world peace (cf., Treasure in Clay, 206). My nephew Isaac, graduated from West Point last year, and is now stationed in Poland. I am in awe and gratitude of his readiness to serve his country and, if necessary, to make the ultimate sacrifice for her. We have added a petition every at Sunday Masses so our courageous men and women in the armed forces do not have to make that ultimate sacrifice. But they are ready to if called upon.

On November 19, 1863, President Abraham Lincoln traveled to Gettysburg, Pennsylvania to dedicate a cemetery and give a brief speech. He delivered one of the most memorable speeches of all time because he intended to honor those who made the ultimate, altruistic sacrifice for their country. The sixteenth president acknowledged humbly: "But in a larger sense we cannot dedicate, we cannot consecrate, we cannot hallow this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. It is for us, the living, rather, to be dedicated here, to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly” – notice the nobility of such sacrifice – “advanced…[T]hat we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain, that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom, and that government of the people, by the people, and for the people, shall not perish from the earth.” I cannot think of a more patriotic speech – except perhaps Mark Antony’s eulogy of Caesar in Shakespeare’s play “Julius Caesar” (III, ii, 1617-1797) – that praises the heroic nature of altruistic, voluntary suffering.

This, then, is the second course of studies in our school of hard knocks, this academy of aches. Unlike the first course of involuntary suffering which touches everyone without exception – democratic we might say – voluntary suffering by contrast can be described by the Marine Corps motto: “The few, the proud, the Marines.” That is, unlike most people whose personal paradigm is to maximize pleasure and minimize pain, some people discover the value of voluntary suffering. Among this remarkable minority of the human race, some accept suffering for physical fitness or financial fitness. Whereas, within families and nations there is an even narrower, nobler few, an aristocracy of altruistic sufferers, that put other’s happiness before their own. They are willing to die so that others may live – their “death” might give this nation “a new birth" – mothers and fathers, and men and women in uniform who protect the freedoms the rest of us take for granted. As King Henry declared in his famous St. Crispian’s Day speech: “We few, we happy few, we band of brothers; / For he to-day that shed his blood with me / Shall be my brother” (Henry V, IV, iii).

Praised be Jesus Christ!

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