Doing the Difficult Thing

Showing our love for Jesus and for our neighbor

07/25/2023

Mt 20:20-28 The mother of the sons of Zebedee approached Jesus with her sons and did him homage, wishing to ask him for something. He said to her, "What do you wish?" She answered him, "Command that these two sons of mine sit, one at your right and the other at your left, in your Kingdom." Jesus said in reply, "You do not know what you are asking. Can you drink the chalice that I am going to drink?" They said to him, "We can." He replied, "My chalice you will indeed drink, but to sit at my right and at my left, this is not mine to give but is for those for whom it has been prepared by my Father." When the ten heard this, they became indignant at the two brothers. But Jesus summoned them and said, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and the great ones make their authority over them felt. But it shall not be so among you. Rather, whoever wishes to be great among you shall be your servant; whoever wishes to be first among you shall be your slave. Just so, the Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many."

One of the greatest challenges in raising young people in Christian virtues today is explaining the virtue of chastity. That is, why they should save sex for marriage. I sometimes use this approach. I ask young people: which shows you love someone more: by doing something easy for them, or by doing something hard for them?

Imagine one boy who wants to prove his love for his girlfriend and pulls out a toy ring from the bottom of a Crackerjacks box and says proudly, “I love you!” Now imagine another boy who works two jobs, saves all his money for two years, and buys his girlfriend a beautiful ring with a precious stone, and declares: “I love you!” Which boy demonstrated true love? Clearly, the one who did something hard, not the one who took the easy path.

And then I ask the young couple: which is easier, to engage in sex, or to abstain from sex until marriage? Even a celibate priest knows the difference between those two things. As a matter of fact, precisely that difference, and catching which is harder, inspired me to become a priest. In other words, the life-long chastity called celibacy was a way of doing something hard out of love for Jesus. The best way to tell someone you love them is by doing something difficult, not something easy.

In the gospel today, Jesus is also trying to teach his apostles that true love is proven by doing the difficult thing not the easy task. The mother of Zebedee’s sons, Mrs. Zebedee, asks that her sons, James and John, sit at Jesus’ right and left in his kingdom. But Jesus replies in effect: “No, that is too easy! Real discipleship, real Christian love, is shown by doing what’s difficult.” And so he asks them, “Can you drink the chalice that I am going to drink?” And they answer, “We can.”

And by the way, what was the chalice and what did it contain? It was the chalice of suffering and death, and it contained the Precious Blood of Jesus shed on the cross. In other words, Jesus is the great Teacher, who instructs first by his own example. He helps them understand that love is best shown by doing the difficult thing (drinking the chalice of suffering) rather than by doing the easy thing (sitting on seats of glory). Thus Jesus concludes his lesson saying: “Just so, the Son of Man did not come to be served (easy stuff), but to serve and give his life as a ransom for many (hard stuff).”

Today, July 25, is the feast of St. James, one of the two sons of Zebedee. And he obviously paid very close attention that day when his mom asked Jesus for that favor and how Jesus replied. How so? Well, he was the first of the apostles to drink from Jesus’ chalice of suffering and die for the Lord. According to Acts 12:1-2, he was martyred by King Herod Agrippa in 44 AD.

And remember that was just eleven short years after Jesus’ own death and resurrection in 33 AD. In other words, St. James knew the best way to show someone you love them is by doing something hard for them, not by doing something easy for them. And so he was the first apostle to win the crown of martyrdom.

My friends, we are not all called to be celibate priests, or martyrs for Jesus like St. James. But we can all still show our love for the Lord by doing some difficult thing rather than the easy thing. Besides young people saving sex for marriage, people who suffer some illness or physical malady (especially in old age) can drink from the Lord’s chalice of suffering.

Last Sunday while I was in Pocahontas a lady asked to be anointed after Mass. She was suffering immensely with intense back pain, and there was no simple remedy for her ailment. After the anointing, I invited her to offer up her suffering in union with Jesus on the Cross. She knew that lesson much better than I did, of course.

I suggested she offer her suffering for her children, or friends, or people she knew. I explained that the prayers of those who suffer are extremely powerful. After all, it was Jesus’ agonized prayers on the Cross that saved the world. In other words, her suffering was proof positive she loved Jesus and her neighbor. Why? Because when you love someone, you prove it by doing something hard, not something easy.

Praised be Jesus Christ!