More Mouthwash

Overcoming the fallacy of self-exception

03/22/2022

Mt 18:21-35 Peter approached Jesus and asked him, “Lord, if my brother sins against me, how often must I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus answered, “I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times. That is why the Kingdom of heaven may be likened to a king who decided to settle accounts with his servants. When he began the accounting, a debtor was brought before him who owed him a huge amount. Since he had no way of paying it back, his master ordered him to be sold, along with his wife, his children, and all his property, in payment of the debt. At that, the servant fell down, did him homage, and said, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back in full.’ Moved with compassion the master of that servant let him go and forgave him the loan. When that servant had left, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a much smaller amount. He seized him and started to choke him, demanding, ‘Pay back what you owe.’ Falling to his knees, his fellow servant begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’ But he refused.

I studied philosophy at the University of Dallas, and I must confess, I loved every minute of it. Most students, however, especially seminarians studying to become priests, detested philosophy. One of the hardest courses I took was called “Logic,” and its difficulty may say more about me than about the course: it uncovered my own lack of logic.

One logical fallacy we learned, and I think I’m still trying to learn it, was called “the fallacy of self-exception.” Have you ever heard of that fallacy? It means basically that when we are arguing some point, we leave ourselves out of the consideration. We make an "exception" for ourselves. Self-exception is a failure in logic. Let me give you some examples.

C. S. Lewis once talked about “halitosis,” or bad breath. He said that everyone instantly notices when someone else has bad breath. But no one notices when they have halitosis themselves. Everyone believes their breath smells like spring roses. That is the fallacy of self-exception.

We sometimes have crying babies in church, and that really annoys some people at Mass. But not the priest, of course, we love crying babies, especially when they start howling during the homily. Now the interesting thing is when we bring our own baby (or grandbaby) to Mass and it begins to cry, we think it sounds cute and we think everyone else thinks so too. That is the fallacy of self-exception. The rule applies to everyone but not to me.

Jesus tells a parable today that is essentially another example of the fallacy of self-exception. One servant is indebted to a master and he is forgive a large loan. But he himself has a fellow servant indebted to him whom he refuses to forgive a much smaller loan. Notice how this unforgiving servant believes very strongly in the rule that debts should be paid. However, he happily accepts it when an exception is made for him, which he refuses to accord to another.

Perhaps he should have studied philosophy at the University of Dallas, and he might have seen how he was guilty of the fallacy of self-exception. In other words, the grace of mercy that was given to him should have eagerly been shared with all. The logical fallacy of self-exception is stinking thinking that we should be easily and quickly forgiven, but not others. My breath smells like spring flowers, and my baby’s crying sounds like Beethoven’s 9th symphony.

My friends, I am convinced that this logical fallacy lies behind every complaint we hurl at others. We see this perennially in politics. When the party in power nominates a Supreme Court Justice, the other party uses every trick in the book to stop them. The party in power complains: “That’s not fair!” But when the shoe is on the other foot, and the opposing party holds the reins of power, they turn around and use every trick in the book to torpedo the other party’s nominee. That is the fallacy of self-exception at work.

When we are young we complain about the mistakes and mannerisms of the elderly. But we will commit the same errors when we are old ourselves. The elderly complain about the young but that is because they have forgotten they made the same (or worse) mistakes in their youth. There again is the fallacy of self-exception. This generalization applies to others, but not to me.

It took me many years to realize how we priests are guilty of self-exception as everyone else. It never fails but when a priest is assigned to a new parish he thinks that he arrives on the first day like the knight in shining armor, riding in on his white stallion. He says valiantly: “Good townspeople, fear not, I am here to clean up this terrible mess left by the last pastor!”

But then it hit me one day: there is another priest who is riding into the parish were I was last serving as the pastor and saying the same thing: “Good thing I am here to clean up the mess that old Fr. John Antony left behind!” That is the fallacy of self-exception, and I am as guilty as the next guy.

The next time you are tempted to open your mouth to complain about others or point fingers at another’s mistakes and misdemeanors, remember the easily forgotten fallacy of self-exception, and maybe use little more mouthwash.

Praised be Jesus Christ!