Pangs of Parenting

Seeing how God fulfills all his promises of progeny

04/06/2017

Genesis 17:3-9 When Abram prostrated himself, God spoke to him: "My covenant with you is this: you are to become the father of a host of nations. No longer shall you be called Abram; your name shall be Abraham, for I am making you the father of a host of nations. I will render you exceedingly fertile; I will make nations of you; kings shall stem from you. I will maintain my covenant with you and your descendants after you throughout the ages as an everlasting pact, to be your God and the God of your descendants after you. I will give to you and to your descendants after you the land in which you are now staying, the whole land of Canaan, as a permanent possession; and I will be their God."

          The older I get, the more I see the scope of the sacrifice of celibacy. And I don’t mean only in the lack of a partner but also in not having progeny, children and grandchildren.  Please don’t misunderstand: I am not complaining, but just contemplating. Yesterday, one of the office staff at church brought her new-born baby to the office, a beautiful little girl named “Mariel.” I wondered if I’d be more excited to have a boy or a girl. Would I feel like Luca Brasi who said to Don Corleone, “I am honored that you have invited me to your daughter’s wedding. And I hope that their first child will be a masculine child.” And what about the joy of being a grandparent? That’s a whole other level of love. Proverbs 17:6 says, “Children’s children” – meaning grandchildren – “are the crown of the elderly.” When my parents had their ninth grandbaby, my father’s only comment was, “Keep ‘em coming!” And I always feel a hint of irony whenever anyone calls me “Father.” Yes, my parishioners are my spiritual progeny, but who will I leave my millions to when I die?? The sacrifice of celibacy reaches farther than I had figured.

          In the first reading today, Abraham is not called to be celibate, he’s called to be exactly the opposite as a father of many nations, but he, too, would slowly see the full scope of sacrifice as a father. He only has one legitimate son, Isaac, and so he worried about his progeny and therefore has an illegitimate son, Ishmael. Later, God would even ask Abraham to sacrifice his only son Isaac, which he was willing to do. Indeed, Abraham would only see with the eyes of faith the fulfillment of God’s promise, as Jesus said in the gospel, “Abraham…rejoiced to see my day; he saw it and was glad.” God eventually fulfills all his promises in Jesus. But it was not easy for Abraham to fulfill the demands of fatherhood. In other words, it is not only celibate priests who feel the struggle of fatherhood, but so too all natural fathers and mothers in one way or another.

          Today, I want to pray for all those who carry the cross in trying to be good fathers and mothers but fall under its weight; those who feel the pangs of parenting. I’d like to pray for all those married couples who cannot conceive a child and choose to adopt. May they be as blessed as St. Joseph the foster father of Jesus. I’d like to pray for all the parents who have children born with severe disabilities, especially those babies who did not survive long after birth. May they know their children are angels in heaven. I’d like to pray for all those mothers and fathers who’ve had an abortion, that their broken hearts be healed, and their guilt assuaged. I’d like to pray for all those parents who’ve gotten divorced and feel they have failed their children, may God the Father and Mother Mary make up for what they lack. I’d like to pray for all parents who’ve suffered the untimely death of their child, like my brother and sister-in-law, and have had to bury their children.  May the Lord’s Resurrection give them hope and peace.  I’d like to pray for all those parents who watch helplessly as their children leave the Church. May the angels and saints watch over those children and one day bring them home. Slowly, we all see the full scope of the sacrifice of being fathers and mothers.

          Finally, I’d like to pray for all the priests and monks and nuns who’ve chosen celibacy for the sake of the Kingdom of heaven. May we, too, like Abraham, look with the eyes of faith and see how God fulfills all his promises in Jesus, even his promise of progeny, and that we, too, will “rejoice and be glad.”

          Praised be Jesus Chri

st!