Increasing in holiness and decreasing in happiness
Acts of the Apostles 20:17-27
From Miletus Paul had the presbyters of the Church at
Ephesus summoned. When they came to him,
he addressed them, “You know how I lived among you the whole time from the day
I first came to the province of Asia. I served the Lord with all humility and
with the tears and trials that came to me because of the plots of the Jews, and
I did not at all shrink from telling you what was for your benefit, or from
teaching you in public or in your homes. I earnestly bore witness for both Jews
and Greeks to repentance before God and to faith in our Lord Jesus. But now,
compelled by the Spirit, I am going to Jerusalem. What will happen to me there
I do not know, except that in one city after another the Holy Spirit has been
warning me that imprisonment and hardships await me.”
I sometimes
counsel couples going through marriage problems. Occasionally, the struggles
are so insurmountable that the couple contemplates getting a divorce. Why?
Because they believe God wants them to be happy, and this marriage is making
them miserable. Know any couples like that? I bet you do. At that point, I
always ask them: “Does God want you to be happy, or does God want you to be
holy?” Now, don’t misunderstand me, God does want us to be happy! But is that
all he wants for us? I don’t think so; I believe he also wants us to be holy,
and sometimes, in order to increase in holiness, you have to decrease in
happiness. In many marriages, happiness and holiness are like the opposite
sides of a see-saw: when one goes up, the other usually comes down.
Happiness usually means taking the path of
least resistance, doing what feels good and is fun, giving in to peer pressure
instead of standing your ground. But Archbishop Fulton Sheen, the great
Catholic tele-evangelist of the last century, said, “Dead fish float down
stream; it takes live fish to fight against the current.” In other words,
resistance, struggle, adversity, are good things. You see, God designed this
whole world to be a great, big saint-making machine, and the gear that grinds
the most is marriage. To be sure, God wants you to be happy, but he wants you
to be holy even more, that is what he made this world for.
In the first
reading today, St. Paul is learning this lesson as well, that is, he’s riding
the sacred see-saw of happiness and holiness. He says, “The Holy Spirit has
been warning me that imprisonment and hardships await me.” If St. Paul had
asked himself, “Does God want me to be happy or does God want me to be holy?”
What would the answer have been? Obviously, God wanted St. Paul to be holy in
this world – imprisonment and hardships were his lot – so he could be happy in
the next world. You see, on the sacred see-saw of life, holiness goes up now,
so that happiness can go up later.
Boys and
girls, have you ever said, “I’m sure God wants me to be happy!”? When we say
that we usually mean life should be easy, I should get what I want, I should
not struggle or suffer. It should be easy to learn an instrument in band
without hours of practice. Everyone should make the dance and cheer team, no
one should be cut. I should not have to study for tests and still make an “A”
in all my classes. Last Saturday, Coach
Vitale and I were talking about his football camps this summer. I gave him a
little advice: “Make them unhappy!” In other words, make them sweat, struggle
and strain; kick them in the butt! (It’s okay, you can say “butt” in junior
high.) Boys and girls, we’re all riding the sacred see-saw, where happiness has
to go down in order for holiness (and for greatness) to go up.
The
Buddhists have an aphorism that I often think about. They say, “My enemy, my
teacher.” In other words, the one who is trying to kill me, the one who is
trying to make me unhappy, will be the one who teaches me the most. Does God
want you to be happy? Yes. But he wants you to be holy even more. Sometimes, he
may even look like your enemy.
Praised be
Jesus Christ!
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