The Unforgiving Son

Seeing our own sins instead of those of others

03/23/2019

Luke 15:1-3, 11-32 Tax collectors and sinners were all drawing near to listen to Jesus, but the Pharisees and scribes began to complain, saying, "This man welcomes sinners and eats with them." So to them Jesus addressed this parable. "A man had two sons, and the younger son said to his father, 'Father, give me the share of your estate that should come to me.' So the father divided the property between them. After a few days, the younger son collected all his belongings and set off to a distant country where he squandered his inheritance on a life of dissipation. Now the older son had been out in the field and, on his way back, as he neared the house, he heard the sound of music and dancing. He called one of the servants and asked what this might mean. The servant said to him, 'Your brother has returned and your father has slaughtered the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.' He became angry, and when he refused to enter the house, his father came out and pleaded with him. He said to his father in reply, 'Look, all these years I served you and not once did I disobey your orders; yet you never gave me even a young goat to feast on with my friends. But when your son returns who swallowed up your property with prostitutes, for him you slaughter the fattened calf.' He said to him, 'My son, you are here with me always; everything I have is yours. But now we must celebrate and rejoice, because your brother was dead and has come to life again; he was lost and has been found.'"

Probably the most popular parable in the whole bible is today’s pericope from Luke 15 of the prodigal son. It is one of my personal favorites and even on the cover of my last book Oh, Lord, Have Mercy, the painting by the Dutch master Rembrandt. But I’m afraid most people miss the main point of the parable. That is, readers focus on the wrong son and the wrong sin. Now, that mistake is understandable and forgivable because in the parable Jesus devotes thirteen verses talking about the younger son, but only dedicates eight verses on the older son. So, naturally, most people think the parable is about the prodigal, younger son. But not so, not so at all.

I would suggest to you the parable is really about the older brother, who struggles to forgive his little brother. In other words, the parable should not be called “The Prodigal Son,” but rather a better title would be “The Unforgiving Son.” How do you figure out the main actor of a parable? You ask: who is the main audience of the parable, who was it intended for? Listen to the introduction to the parable, where St. Luke gives it all away. Luke writes: “Tax collectors and sinners were all drawing near to listen to Jesus, but the Pharisees and the scribes began to complain, ‘This man welcomes sinners and eats with them,’ So to them Jesus addressed this parable.” Did you catch the intended audience? It was not the tax collectors and prostitutes (the prodigals), but rather the scribes and Pharisees (the self-righteous and arrogant).

You could almost assert that the first thirteen verses of the parable are all preparation, merely setting up the stage for the real drama, for the entrance of the main actor, the protagonist of the parable, the older brother and his dialogue with his dad. I believe the reason Jesus spends all those verses on the sinful young brother is in order to highlight the arrogance and the attitude of unforgiveness of the older brother. His sin is seen in greater relief by contrast to the mercy and tenderness of the father, who was a symbol of Jesus. Nevertheless, even with such a powerful, pointed parable, the scribes and Pharisees missed the point. They continued to maintain their innocence and, by contrast, the guilt of tax-collectors and prostitutes, and eventually even find Jesus guilty of sin and sacrilege, just like the older brother blamed his father’s merciful behavior as partial and playing favorites.

My friends, may I suggest two practical lessons Luke 15 offers each of us? First, just like we miss the main focus of the parable, so we often focus on other people’s sins and miss our own moral failings. It’s easy to see the sins of the prodigal (others’ sins), but that is only the prelude to the real story: the arrogance and unforgiveness of the older brother (our own sins). We miss seeing ourselves as we really are, just like the image in the mirror each morning is not our real image. If we wink our right eye in the mirror, the face that looks back blinks his left eye. It is as easy to see our sins as it is to see our own nose by crossing our eyes. In a sense, we have never really seen ourselves as we truly are. We are not the best judge in our own case, and that is why physicians are forbidden to prescribe medicines to themselves, and also why priests cannot go to confession by looking in the mirror and absolving their image. I would not be forgiving Fr. John of his sins, but only the ghost of Fr. John. Only another priest can forgive me because only another priest can see my sins as they really are; he can easily see my arrogance and my unforgiveness, which I sadly cannot.

The second practical consideration is this: next Tuesday, we have our parish reconciliation service. I think the best way to make a good confession – and I’ve suggested this before – is to let your wife make the list of your sins, and you write the list of her sins. Parents should write up a list of their children’s sins and children should write up a list of their parents’ sins. Pastors should compose a list of their church secretary’s sins, and church secretaries should definitely NOT write lists of their pastor’s sins – God help us! And how would we all react if we saw those lists? We would laugh and reply: “Of course, I don’t do any of those things!” We only prove our own blindness. And that is why we continue to confess the same sins over and over in confession, because we cannot see our own sins. What heroic humility it would take for anyone to confess the sins that others see in us.

The parable of the prodigal son is not really about the prodigal son. The younger son is only teeing up the real point and the real protagonist of the parable. So, too, we miss our own sins and failings. Indeed, what we do see of our sins are only teeing up the real sins we commit but miss, and that others see so easily.

Praised be Jesus Christ!