Fighting for Family

Loving brothers and sisters in Christ throughout the world

03/18/2018

John 12:20-33 Some Greeks who had come to worship at the Passover Feast came to Philip, who was from Bethsaida in Galilee, and asked him, "Sir, we would like to see Jesus." Philip went and told Andrew; then Andrew and Philip went and told Jesus. Jesus answered them, "The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. Amen, amen, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains just a grain of wheat;  but if it dies, it produces much fruit. Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will preserve it for eternal life. Whoever serves me must follow me, and where I am, there also will my servant be. The Father will honor whoever serves me.

There’s an old saying that no one fights like family. But we have to remember that no one loves like family either. I like to say that it is worth fighting for the family we love, and sort of combine both sayings. Since we are starting Spring Break this weekend, and spending a little more time with family or visiting family, I would like to shed a little light on family life from the lamp of the gospel.

First, however, a few jokes about marriage and family to lighten the mood a little. A man and his wife were sitting in the living room discussing a living will. The man said adamantly, “Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.” His wife immediately got up, unplugged the television and threw out all the beer.

A married couple was celebrating their sixtieth wedding anniversary. At the party everyone wanted to know how they managed to stay married so long in this day and age. The husband responded: “When we were first married we came to an agreement. I would make all the major decisions and my wife would make all the minor decisions.  And in sixty years of marriage, we have never needed to make one major decision.”

Mind if I share one more? An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and was fitted for hearing aids that restored his hearing to one hundred percent. He returned a month later and the doctor said, “Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really happy you can hear again.” The gentleman replied, “Oh, I haven’t told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to their conversations. I have changed my will three times.” All families are like fudge: mostly sweet with a few nuts. Sometimes our families can feel like an unbearable burden, but they can also be a source of unbelievable blessings, so they are worth fighting for.

Even though today’s gospel does not speak about family explicitly, I believe it does implicitly, and therefore, importantly. Some Greeks seek an audience with Jesus, and Philip and Andrew escort them into Jesus’ presence. That may seem like an innocuous and innocent enough encounter, but it was nothing of the sort for Jesus. He suddenly and apparently out of the blue exclaims, “The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified!” Now you have to remember that up to this point in John’s gospel, Jesus has always repeated that his hour had not yet come. That is what he told Mary when she said they had run out of wine in Cana in Galilee, “My hour has not yet come.”

But now upon seeing the Greeks, Jesus saw his life’s purpose flash before his eyes, namely, to save all people, not just Jews but also the gentiles, the Greeks. That is, he had come to establish a “universal church,” in Greek, “katholiké ekklesía,” a catholic church. But his purpose was more personal than even that, it was to establish his own “worldwide family.” Scott Hahn explained: “The Catholic Church is God’s worldwide family that the Father sent the Son to establish by the Spirit” (A Father Who Keeps His Promises, 242). When Jesus sees the two Greeks standing alongside the two Jews (Andrew and Philip), he saw his whole world-wide family in microcosm, a snapshot. Jesus knew that his spiritual family of the Catholic Church would also be like fudge: mostly sweet with a few nuts.

Everyone who is baptized, therefore, always belongs to two families: a biological family but also a spiritual family, a natural family but also a supernatural family, an earthly family but also a heavenly family. For example, I belong to two families: the natural family called “Antony,” but also to the supernatural family called “Immaculate Conception.” Let me suggest three ways you can love both these families, and fight for these two families.

First of all, pray. Pray together with your family (like we do every Sunday by gathering for the Mass), and pray for your family, especially those you do not get along with. When we mention people in the petitions of the Mass – the pope, the president, tornado victims, the hungry, the homeless, or whomever – do you realize we are praying for our brothers and sisters in Christ? We should get as excited about them as Jesus became about meeting the Greeks. “The hour has come” for us to see we all belong to Jesus’ worldwide family of the Church, and pray for each other.

Second, do not lose your sense of humor in dealing with your family. Don’t take your family members too seriously, and don’t take yourself too seriously. Be able to laugh at yourself, and that is why I began with a few jokes about family life. The church staff loves to poke fun at my idiosyncrasies, and I laugh along with them. But since I do not really have any, I have to pretend to laugh.

Thirdly, and this is the hardest thing: hold hope high. That is, do not give up on people, including yourself. People change. Just think about how much you have changed in the last ten years from how you used to think and act. Sometimes we think someone will never change: they were born that way and they will die that way. But that is not true. The ancient Greek philosopher, Heraclitus, said, “No man ever steps into the same river twice, for it is not the same river and he is not the same man.” You change as rapidly as a river flows, and so do others. Therefore, you have good reason to hold hope high for your family members.

As you spend extra time with your family this Spring Break, remember these three tips for a happier family life: pray, laugh and hope. That will help you get along with your biological as well as your spiritual family. And it will help them to get along better with you.

Praised be Jesus Christ!