The Wingman

Accepting the role of the supporting saint  

Acts of the Apostles 11:21B-26; 13:1-3 

In those days a great number who believed turned to the Lord. The news about them reached the ears of the Church in Jerusalem, and they sent Barnabas to go to Antioch. When he arrived and saw the grace of God, he rejoiced and encouraged them all to remain faithful to the Lord in firmness of heart, for he was a good man, filled with the Holy Spirit and faith. And a large number of people was added to the Lord. Then he went to Tarsus to look for Saul, and when he had found him he brought him to Antioch. For a whole year they met with the Church and taught a large number of people, and it was in Antioch that the disciples were first called Christians.   

          Have you heard of the “wingman” before? The concept comes from the U.S. Air Force, where fighter jets fly in tight tactical formation. Next to the lead jet is the so-called “wingman,” whose role is to follow the lead of the principal pilot. The wingman is supposed to protect the lead pilot, to “cover his six” as they say, so that the lead pilot can take out the primary target. Now, the Urban Dictionary defines the wingman as a friend you take along on a double-date, who entertains the less desirable of the duo, while you focus on the hot chick. So, the wingman has lots of applications.  In whatever situation, though, the great value of the wingman is he embodies the virtue of humility; he’s not jealous or envious of the main pilot, who gets all the praise and the props.   

          Do you remember at the end of the movie, Top Gun, no one wants to be the wingman? Iceman says to Maverick: “You. You can be my wingman anytime.” And Maverick replies, “No way, you can be mine.” But you see, someone has to be the wingman; without one, the operation simply will not succeed.   

          Today is the feast day of St. Barnabas, and in my opinion, he’s the spiritual equivalent of a wingman. What do I mean? Well, in the New Testament, especially in the Acts of the Apostles, Paul and Barnabas travel together, preaching and teaching. But who’s the hero, who gets all the glory? Clearly, it is St. Paul, who is ranked among the saints right up there with St. Peter. So, who was St. Barnabas? He was St. Paul’s wingman – he traveled with him, he “covered his six,” he made sure Paul had the spiritual support to be successful. In other words, Barnabas embodies the great virtue of humility; he let Paul get all the praise and the props. Nevertheless, St. Barnabas, while relatively unknown, played a huge part in the success of Paul’s missionary journeys. Barnabas humbly said to Paul, “I’ll be your wingman.”   

          My friends, I am convinced that nothing sucks the life out of success like jealousy and envy. On the other hand, nothing else breathes success into an organization like the humility emblematic of the wingman. This dynamic can be seen in families, where sibling rivalry – where no one wants to be the wingman – leaves deep wounds that take a lifetime to heal. This happens in companies where one person gets the promotion and another must be the wingman, but refuses to play that part. This even happens in the Church, where one priest gets to be the pastor and another must be the associate, or the wingman. I am very happy to have Fr. Pius here, who humbly says to me every morning, “I’ll be your wingman.” Or, at least that’s what he says.   

          Sometimes in life we get to be the hero and get all the glory. At other times, we have to be humble and accept the role of the wingman. The success of any organization depends on having both.   

          Praised be Jesus Christ! 

Only a Flesh Wound

Learning and living the logic of love by seeking sacrifice  

Matthew 5:27-32  

Jesus said to his disciples: “If your right eye causes you to sin,  tear it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one of your members than to have your whole body thrown into Gehenna. And if your right hand causes you to sin,  cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one of your members than to have your whole body go into Gehenna.”   

          Sometimes young couples in love have a hard time staying chaste. They can’t keep their hands off each other, and then one thing leads to another, and chastity goes out the window. So, I ask these young star-crossed lovers this question. How do you prove your love to each other, by doing something easy or by doing something difficult? Usually they answer, by doing something difficult. Then I ask: well, which is harder to do, having sex or not having sex? Obviously, not having sex is harder than jumping into bed. So, if you’re not married, the better way to show someone your love is by not having sex with them. By the way, the number of couples I’ve convinced with this argument is a whopping zero.   

          This was the same logic of love that led me into the priesthood, namely, the sacrifice of celibacy. As a young man, I wanted to show Jesus I loved him, and quite spontaneously I looked for a sacrifice and saw celibacy. I realized that love proves itself by doing something difficult. I know some people say if we just let men get married, there would no longer be a priest shortage. Maybe that’s true. But speaking very personally, I would be deeply disappointed the day the Church no longer required priests to be celibate. On that day, we would lose an important lesson in love.   

          In today’s gospel, Jesus is trying to teach his disciples this same lesson about love, that is, genuine love proves itself by sacrifice. So, our Lord says some astonishing things: “If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away.” Later he adds, “If you right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away.” Those lines always remind me of that scene in the Monty Python movie where King Arthur cuts off the Black Knight’s both arms and both legs, and remarkably the Knight retorts, “It’s only a flesh wound!” In other words, both Jesus and the Black Knight would agree when you love someone, you prove it by sacrifice, even being willing to lose and eye or an arm or a leg. You see, real love always seeks some sacrifice.   

          My friends, would you like to test your love for Jesus? Then just apply this little litmus test of love: ask yourself, do I feel like doing something difficult for Jesus, or am I happy just doing what’s easy? Real love always seeks some sacrifice. Perhaps you can let go of some past hurt and forgive the person who hurt you. Maybe you can give up an addiction, like alcohol or smoking or pornography. Maybe you can go on our mission trip to Honduras next year. I’ll never forget two years ago in January the parking lot was covered in ice and I figured no one would come for daily Mass. But I opened the church anyway, and looked across the parking lot and saw Leo Anhalt and Fred DeMiranda crawling on their hands and knees over the ice to come to daily Mass.  That was for a daily Mass.

          Those who understand the logic of love always seek some sacrifice to prove their love. For such star-crossed lovers, losing an eye or an arm or a leg, would be “only a flesh wound.”   

          Praised be Jesus Christ!   

Tombstone

Pretending to live in peace or taking up spiritual arms

1 Kings 18:20-39  

Ahab sent to all the children of Israel and had the prophets assemble on Mount Carmel. Elijah appealed to all the people and said, “How long will you straddle the issue? If the LORD is God, follow him; if Baal, follow him.”

          It is generally good to try to live in peace with other people. But sometimes it becomes clear that peace is not possible. That is, we have to take sides, to stand on the side of what is true, what is good, what is right, while standing against what is false and evil and wrong. This is how Thomas Jefferson began the Declaration of Independence. He wrote: “When in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bonds which have connected them with another…” and from there he proceeds to list all the reasons why the revolutionaries where right. It was time to take sides, peace was no longer possible.   

          Another famous example of taking sides, where peace was not possible, was the old “Shoot-out at the OK Corral.” Do you remember that? The shoot-out occurred on October 26, 1881, in Tombstone, AZ. I mean, who would ever want to live in a town called Tombstone?? On one side of the shoot-out was Wyatt Earp, and his brothers, and Doc Holliday, while lined up on the other side were the so-called “Cowboys,” a nefarious band of outlaws. You see, it was no longer possible to live in peace, it was time to take sides, and to resolve the matter with war.

          In the first reading today from the first book of Kings, we see a sort of spiritual shoot-out at the OK corral, which didn’t take place in Tombstone, but rather on Mt. Carmel. On the one hand were lined up the 450 prophets of the pagan deity called, “Baal.” He was the arch-rival to Yahweh, the God of Israel. On the other hand, was only one prophet, Elijah. Clearly it was an unfair fight; Elijah would have to take it easy on the 450 prophets of Baal. You see, thus far the people had tried to live in a phony peace with both Baal and Yahweh, trying to serve both Gods. But Elijah prophesies that such peace in not possible, it is only pretend. He challenges the people, saying, “How long will you straddle the issue? If the Lord is God, follow him; if Baal, follow him.” In other words, it was no longer possible to live in such peace.  We know who wins that war.  However, what we did not see in today’s reading, what we would have read a few lines later, is that Elijah takes a sword and proceeds to cut off the heads of the 450 prophets of Baal. Sometimes, peace is not possible, we must go to war.

          Folks, do you sometimes pretend to live in peace, when such peace is not really possible? And I don’t mean going to war against terrorism, or choosing sides with political parties. I mean spiritually speaking, in our hearts and in our choices, we have to take sides because such spiritual peace is only pretend. In other words, we have a shoot-out at the OK corral going on inside each of us, and we must reject sin and Satan and stand on the side of God and his grace. St. Paul said it eloquently, “But I see in my members another principle at war with the law of my mind” (Rom. 7:23). That is, there is a spiritual shoot-out going on inside each of, all the time, with temptation and sin. We have to stop pretending that we live in peace.  My friends, we all live in Tombstone.   

          Praised be Jesus Christ!

Discipleship.com

Growing in discipleship inside and outside

Matthew 5:20-26  

Jesus said to his disciples:  “I tell you, unless your righteousness surpasses that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will not enter into the Kingdom of heaven. “You have heard that it was said to your ancestors, You shall not kill; and whoever kills will be liable to judgment. But I say to you, whoever is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment, and whoever says to his brother, ‘Raqa,’ will be answerable to the Sanhedrin, and whoever says, ‘You fool,’ will be liable to fiery Gehenna.

          I’m always mystified and marvel whenever young people come to me seeking advice on dating and romantic relationships. I mean, really? You’re asking a celibate priest about how to make love last?? That’s like asking someone who lives in the desert how to make a snowman. Nevertheless, there is one piece of advice I do give young people in their relationships: when you’re dating someone don’t settle for second best. In fact, the website called “eHarmony.com” has this advice on how to avoid “settling.” It reads: “You know you’re in danger of settling the moment you make a ‘to-do’ list of the things you’d like to help your partner improve upon: lose weight, stop smoking, be more outgoing, find a better job, and so forth. The best person for you will not feel like a fixer-upper.” Now you know where I get all my great dating advice: I subscribe to eHarmony.com. Now, obviously, no one is perfect. But when it comes to choosing your life-partner, don’t settle for second best.

          In the gospel today, Jesus also offers some similar advice, not so much about dating, but rather about discipleship. When our Lord looks for his disciples – really his own life-partners – he doesn’t want to settle for second best. In fact, the whole Sermon on the Mount, from Matthew chapter 5 through 7, is Jesus’ list of qualifications for his disciples. Today, therefore, our Lord says, “Unless your righteousness surpasses that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will not enter into the Kingdom of heaven.” You see, the Pharisees had settled on second-rate spirituality, where they were satisfied with external observance, but without internal intentions. That is what the term “pharisaical” means – being a hypocrite. But Jesus will not settle for second-rate disciples; his followers must be good inside as well as outside.

          If I had to help people not settle in their spirituality, I’d create a website called “discipleship.com.” There, I would list my tips for how to become the best disciple you can, and not be a “fixer-upper.” In fact, I’ve come up with a pneumonic device to remember the seven deadly sins. It’s an acronym that spells “EGGSLAP.” One person thought I said, “EGGSALAD” and so she thought there were actually eight deadly sins. What are the seven deadly sins? “E” is for envy, or jealousy, wanting what others have. “G” stands for gluttony, excess in eating or drinking. The second “G” means greed or desiring too many possessions. The “S” is for sloth or being lazy. “L” is for lust, and I don’t need to explain that one to you.  “A” is for anger, which Jesus mentions in today’s gospel.  And “P” is for pride or too much ego. You see, overcoming the seven deadly sins helps you be a disciple inside and outside.

          You know, I can’t tell you much about dating, but I do know a thing or two about discipleship. In both areas of life, whether dating or discipleship, “the best person for you will not feel like a fixer-upper.”

          Praised be Jesus Christ! 

Eating Goat’s Head

Receiving a man of God into your home and heart  

1 Kings 17:7-16

The brook near where Elijah was hiding ran dry, because no rain had fallen in the land. So the LORD said to Elijah:  “Move on to Zarephath of Sidon and stay there. I have designated a widow there to provide for you.” He left and went to Zarephath. As he arrived at the entrance of the city, a widow was gathering sticks there; he called out to her, “Please bring me a small cupful of water to drink.” She left to get it, and he called out after her, “Please bring along a bit of bread.” She answered, “As the LORD, your God, lives, I have nothing baked; there is only a handful of flour in my jar and a little oil in my jug. Just now I was collecting a couple of sticks, to go in and prepare something for myself and my son; when we have eaten it, we shall die.” Elijah said to her, “Do not be afraid.  Go and do as you propose. But first make me a little cake and bring it to me. Then you can prepare something for yourself and your son. For the LORD, the God of Israel, says, ‘The jar of flour shall not go empty, nor the jug of oil run dry, until the day when the LORD sends rain upon the earth.’” She left and did as Elijah had said. She was able to eat for a year, and Elijah and her son as well; the jar of flour did not go empty, nor the jug of oil run dry, as the LORD had foretold through Elijah.   

          One of my priorities as a priest is going over to parishioners’ homes for supper. I do that mainly because I don’t cook and I would starve to death otherwise. But I also do it as a way to get to know my parishioners. It is much easier to get to know people sitting around their kitchen table. Now, there are some occupational hazards with going to people’s homes for supper, like not knowing what they might serve you.   

          Msgr. Scott Friend tells the story of visiting a Hispanic family’s home many years ago. He was just starting to learn Spanish and, as many people do, he simply responded, “Si, Si, Si!” to their questions, even though he had no idea what they were saying. Well, as they were sitting down at the table, the family asked if he would honor them with eating the honorary part of the goat, reserved only for the most special guests, to which he gladly responded, “Si, Si, Si!” And they brought him a fully cooked goat’s head on a platter. I’m sure he gave the best blessing prayer of his life before that meal. But you see, the priestly presence is powerful: it blesses you, it heals you, it brings you light, it shows you God’s love and mercy. In other words, at the supper table, the people feed the priest with a goat’s head, and the priest feeds the people with God’s grace.   

          In the first reading today, we see the prophet Elijah going to someone’s home for supper, too. It happens to be a poor widow, who is about to eat her last morsel of food and then she and her son would die. But Elijah has the gall and gumption to ask her to feed him first! Why? Well, because he knows well that the power of the presence of a man of God will profoundly bless the widow. Indeed, even though the entire town Zarephath was suffering from a severe famine, this widow and her son, thanks to Elijah, had more than enough food to eat. You see, when you invite a priest or prophet into your home for supper, get ready for beautiful blessings: the people feed the priest, and the priest feeds the people.   

          My friends, let me invite you to considering inviting a priest over to your home for supper. I know this is not easy for everyone. When I was growing up, we never invited the priest over for supper. We felt like it was like inviting Jesus over for supper, and we didn’t believe that our home was worthy. But I am convinced that anyone who let’s a priest into their home and into their hearts will be blessed. The priest will bring you some healing for your family, he will share with you the joy of Jesus, he will impart some wisdom from the gospel, he will help you to love God a little more and to remember that God loves you. Wouldn’t that priestly blessing be worth serving him a hamburger or a hot-dog for supper? Heck, it might even be worth giving him the honored plate of the goat’s head.   

          Praised be Jesus Christ! 

Monsignor Mercy

Showing mercy and being twice blessed  

Luke 7:11-17  

Jesus journeyed to a city called Nain, and his disciples and a large crowd accompanied him. As he drew near to the gate of the city, a man who had died was being carried out, the only son of his mother, and she was a widow. A large crowd from the city was with her. When the Lord saw her, he was moved with pity for her and said to her, “Do not weep.” He stepped forward and touched the coffin; at this the bearers halted, and he said, “Young man, I tell you, arise!” The dead man sat up and began to speak, and Jesus gave him to his mother. Fear seized them all, and they glorified God, crying out “A great prophet has arisen in our midst, “ and “God has visited his people.” This report about him spread through the whole of Judea and in all the surrounding region.   

          Some of the most memorable moments in life are touched by mercy. Sometimes in a gratuitous, unexpected and undeserved way, another person becomes the instrument of God’s mercy for us. I’ll never forget when that happened to me as a newly ordained priest. It was April, 1997 and after working as a priest for a year, I had just put together my tax documents, and was shocked that I owed $2,000 in taxes. You see, I had never earned enough money before to even pay taxes, so this came as quite a surprise. But now that I was a rich priest, I had to give my “pound of flesh” to the IRS. That April afternoon, Msgr. Hebert walked by my office and noticed the alarmed and anxious look on my face. He immediately surmised my predicament and asked, “Well, John, how much do you owe?” I answered in a sheepish and small voice, “I owe $2,000.” He smiled and said, “Don’t worry, I will help you pay it.” I could have run up to him and kissed him; but I didn’t. Now that I am a pastor myself, I make sure to avoid the associate priests during the month of April, so I don’t have to give them $2,000. But you see, Msgr. Hebert was an instrument of God’s mercy for me, and I’ll never forget that moment.   

          You know, there is no more eloquent exposition of mercy than in Shakespeare’s play, The Merchant of Venice. A very wise woman, named Portia, explains what mercy is.  She says:  “The quality of mercy is not strained;  It droppeth like the gentle rain from heaven  Upon the place beneath. It is twice blest;  It blesseth him that gives and him that takes;  ‘Tis mightiest in the mightiest; it becomes  The throned monarch better than his crown.”    She goes on:    “[Mercy] is enthroned in the hearts of kings,  It is an attribute of God himself;  And earthly power doth then show likest God’s  When mercy seasons justice” (The Merchant of Venice, IV, 1). Did you catch all that? In other words, the best kind of kings always season their justice with mercy, just like we season our French fries with salt: both justice and French fries taste better when they are seasoned. By the way, the phrase “a pound of flesh” comes from this play, and Portia’s plea was to forgive and not demand the pound of flesh. Monsignor’s mercy helped me escape from paying my own “pound of flesh” to the IRS. The most memorable moments in life are marked by mercy.   

          In the gospel today we see Jesus also seasoning justice with mercy. He comes upon a procession of mourners carrying a deceased young man to be buried. Then Jesus, suddenly moved with mercy, goes over to the coffin, touches the young man, and raises him to life. Notice no one asked Jesus for this miracle – not even the young man’s mother – it was unexpected, it was undeserved, it was gratuitous. Portia’s words shine out in Jesus’ actions: “The quality of mercy is not strained; It droppeth like the gentle rain from heaven…It is an attribute of God himself.” And how did the people react? We read: “They glorified God, crying out ‘A great prophet has arisen in our midst’ and ‘God had visited his people’.” Just like I was blessed by Msgr. Hebert’s unsolicited and generous mercy and wanted to kiss him, so the widow and the people praise God for this miracle of mercy. The most memorable moments are touched with mercy.   

          This weekend parishioners from Immaculate Conception Church are seeking to be touched by God’s mercy, too. Oh, they’re not hoping for Msgr. Hebert to give them $2,000, or for Jesus to raise a dead man back to life – although both those things would be great – rather, they seek a “plenary indulgence” for their sins. What is a “plenary indulgence”? Well, when we sin, we not only need “forgiveness” but we also need to do “penance” in order to balance the scales of justice. But this weekend we walk through the Holy Door, and like Portia, we ask God to “season his justice with mercy,” and remove all the temporal punishments for sin. In other words, a plenary indulgence is like a “get out of jail free card,” which gets us out of purgatory free. In Shakespearean language, a plenary indulgence asks God not to require his pound of flesh from us sinners.   

          Of course, we should not only seek to receive mercy; we should be eager to dole it out to others. My friends, look for moments that are unexpected, undeserved, and unsolicited, and season you own sense of justice with mercy. Forgive someone who has hurt you, and don’t hold a grudge. Leave a larger tip at a restaurant than you usually do. Visit your parents even when it’s not Thanksgiving or Christmas. Give a little more in the Sunday collection (you knew that was coming). Help a perfect stranger who cannot pay you back. Adopt a child in a foreign country by supporting them financially. Do not demand that someone give you the “pound of flesh” that they legitimately owe you. Why? Well because “the quality of mercy is not strained, It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven Upon the place beneath. It is twice blest; it blesseth him that gives and him that takes.”   

          A few years ago, Msgr. Hebert lavished his mercy upon me again. He invited me and another priest to travel with him to San Francisco, where we stayed in a fancy hotel and got to tour the wine country. He covered all our expenses. Once again, Msgr. Hebert blessed me with a memorable act of mercy: undeserved, unexpected, and gratuitous. Maybe this means I need to stop avoiding my associate priest in the month of April.   

          Praised be Jesus Christ!  

The Inquirer

Believing first and understanding second  

Luke 2:41-51  

Each year Jesus’ parents went to Jerusalem for the feast of Passover, and when he was twelve years old, they went up according to festival custom. After they had completed its days, as they were returning, the boy Jesus remained behind in Jerusalem, but his parents did not know it. When his parents saw him, they were astonished, and his mother said to him, “Son, why have you done this to us? Your father and I have been looking for you with great anxiety.” And he said to them, “Why were you looking for me? Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?” But they did not understand what he said to them…. and his mother kept all these things in her heart.   

          A few weeks ago, I had a conversation with a young man that was both exhilarating but also exhausting. Like most young people he was going through a period of intense questioning and doubts about his faith. But there was no question about his sincerity; he genuinely wanted to understand. For instance, he asked, “Why does the Bible say the earth was created 6,000 years ago, but science has shown it existed for millions of years?” He also said, “I’ve studied St. Thomas Aquinas’ proofs for God’s existence and I’m not very convinced.” He later asked, “Aren’t all the major world religions – Christianity, Hinduism, Islam – essentially the same?” Could you answer these questions? My first reaction was to think, “Man, they don’t pay me enough for this job!”   

          But instead, I answered, “Well, I begin with belief in God; I don’t question his existence. Then, I begin to see that if God wanted us to know him with scientific certainty and experiments, he would have created a world where that was possible. But apparently, he thought this kind of world was better, where we would know him by faith more than through science.” In other words, begin with the answers and then you’ll understand the questions better. But if you begin with the questions, you may never find the answers. This was, in fact, essentially St. Anselm’s approach, when he said, “fides quaerens intellectum,” or faith seeking understanding. First believe, and then you’ll understand.  

          In the gospel today, Mary adopts Anselm’s approach as well: first believe and then understand. Jesus is 12 years old and stays in the Temple, which both surprised and saddened Joseph and Mary. His parents must have had many questions, like my young inquirer, and, also like him, they didn’t receive very satisfactory or sensible answers. So what does Mary do? Like Anselm, she says, I will believe even though I do not understand. The gospel records, “his mother kept all these things in her heart.” In other words, Mary believed first, and understanding would come second. Fides quaerens intellectum; faith seeking understanding. 

          My friends, it is not just young people who question and doubt their faith, so do older Catholics and even priests. Have you ever wondered why the innocent suffer, like babies born with the Zika virus and partially formed brains? Or ever pondered why most of the wars in human history were fought in the name of religion? Do you worry about our country becoming less Christian and more atheistic? Why would a good God create a place like Hell? Have you still not figured out who killed JR?? None of these questions has easy answers (except the last one). And I suggest you do what Mary and Anselm did: believe first and then understand second.   

          You see, I believe in a loving and wise God, who desires our happiness even more than we do. And if he had wanted to create a world in which we had easy answers to such questions, he would have made that world. But apparently, he thought this kind of world – where we have unanswered questions and nagging doubts – was a better world. And if you don’t like this world, when you get to heaven, you can ask him, “Why?”

          Praised be Jesus Christ!