The Acorn

Learning to be honest and transparent with others

01/30/2025

Mark 4:21-25 Jesus said to his disciples, “Is a lamp brought in to be placed under a bushel basket or under a bed, and not to be placed on a lampstand? For there is nothing hidden except to be made visible; nothing is secret except to come to light. Anyone who has ears to hear ought to hear.” He also told them, “Take care what you hear. The measure with which you measure will be measured out to you, and still more will be given to you. To the one who has, more will be given; from the one who has not, even what he has will be taken away.”

I heard a Taylor Swift song recently that had a great line in it which I want to use for my homily. Now, I promise not to get all my theology from T. Swift, but every now-and-then she stumbles on a real winner. It’s like the criticism Protestants leveled at the Catholic Church during the Protestant Reformation: even a blind sow can find an acorn once in a while. I apologize to all the Swifties for just comparing her to a blind sow.

In her very catchy new release called “Cruel Summer,” we hear these languish lyrics: “I’m drunk in the back of the car, / And I cried like a baby coming home from the bar / Said, ‘I’m fine’ but it wasn’t true / I don’t wanna keep secrets just to keep you.” Did you catch that last line – it was “the acorn” that she stumbled onto. That is, true love does not deal in deceptions but demands transparency, vulnerability, honesty. That is what made the summer so cruel: keeping secrets in love.

In the gospel today we hear that Jesus does not want to experience that cruel summer either, that is, he does not tolerate his disciples being deceptive or secretive with him or with the world. He states: “For there is nothing hidden except to be made visible; nothing secret except to come to light.” In other words, there is no room in our relationship with Jesus for a kind of clandestine Catholicism, or as one theologian put it: stealth Catholicism.

If we choose to follow Jesus we should not hide our faith – like Peter did when he denied our Lord three times – but accept the consequences of being openly seen and known as a Christian. Think about it like this: if we were put on trial for being a Christian would there be enough evidence to convict us? Jesus sings to us like Taylor Swift: “I don’t wanna keep secrets just to keep you.”

Another relationship where this is no room for secrets is in our marriages. And I try to emphasize this when young engaged couples come to me for marriage preparation. I will never forget a priest from Brooklyn who taught us in the seminary that when such couples come to meet with us, “They lie, they lie, they lie!” Well, I don’t really care if they lie to me, but I encourage them not to lie to each other.

One of the instruments we use to help them get to know each other better is a personality survey called FOCCUS. It gives them a long list of statements and they have to answer “Agree” or “Disagree” or “Undecided.” I tell them that there is not right or wrong answer, but only an honest and less-than-honest answer. That might sound like an easy thing to do, because we all think, “I am an honest person.”

But sometimes we are tempted to be a little less than honest because we don’t want to hurt the other person’s feelings if they knew what we really thought. So we hide our feelings and keep little secrets. But I tell them the worst thing that can happen to you on your wedding day is that you marry a stranger.

On the other hand, the best thing on your wedding would be if you can look at each other and say, “I know you are not the knight in shining armor, but I still want to spend the rest of my life with you.” How wonderful for someone else to know me – the real me that hides behind all the masks – and still want to spend their life with me. Maybe I should just play that Taylor Swift song when couples come for marriage preparation: “I don’t wanna keep secrets just to keep you.”

As you approach the altar to receive Holy Communion, ask Jesus for the grace to be more transparent, vulnerable, and honest in all your relationships, especially in your relationship with Jesus. Of course it is silly trying to keep secrets from our Lord, who knows us better than we know ourselves. Maybe we are all the blind sow hoping to stumble on that one precious acorn called authentic human love.

Praised be Jesus Christ!