Mastering Mercy

Learning both to receive and give mercy

07/02/2021

Matthew 9:9-13 As Jesus passed by, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the customs post. He said to him, “Follow me.” And he got up and followed him. While he was at table in his house, many tax collectors and sinners came and sat with Jesus and his disciples. The Pharisees saw this and said to his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” He heard this and said, “Those who are well do not need a physician, but the sick do. Go and learn the meaning of the words, I desire mercy, not sacrifice. I did not come to call the righteous but sinners.”

Everyone’s favorite feature of the Christian faith is mercy. Don’t you love mercy? But even though we are ready to receive mercy, sometimes we are very slow to share it. Consider this example. Mr. Green peered over his fence and noticed that the neighbor’s little boy was in his backyard filling in a hole. Curious what the youngster was up to, Mr. Green asked, “What are you doing, Jimmy?” Tearfully, little Jimmy replied, “My goldfish died, and I just buried him.” Mr. Green said, “That’s an awfully large hole for a goldfish, isn’t it?” Patting down the last little bit of earth, little Jimmy replied, “That’s because he’s inside your cat!” Mercy is easy to receive but it can be hard to hand out, even to a cat.

In the gospel today Jesus teaches the message of mercy but he does it in the context of calling St. Matthew, the tax collector. Why? Well, because Jesus always practiced what he preached. Our Lord quotes Hosea 6:6 saying, “I desire mercy not sacrifice.” And then to provide a practical case in point, Jesus calls a notorious sinner, the tax collector, Matthew, to be one of his closest companions. Indeed, Jesus goes a step further and has supper with Matthew and his friends, described as “many tax collectors and sinners.”

Jesus, the only Righteous One, could have condemned Matthew and the other sinners, like the little boy who buried his neighbor’s cat for eating his goldfish. Instead, he shows mercy in the most powerful way, not only forgiving the sin but by becoming intimate friends with the sinner. I cannot help but wonder if Matthew, the gospel writer, did not have tears in his eyes and a trembling hand as he wrote chapter 9 of his gospel and recalled when he first received mercy. The original autograph text of St. Matthew’s gospel would not have coffee stains but tear stains. The gospel of Matthew contains a core message of mercy, both lavishly given and lovingly received.

Today, our job is to look at mercy not only as ready recipients but also as eager givers. Here are some suggestions on how to mete out mercy. First of all, mercy should be the mantra of every marriage. What ultimately leads couples to disagreements, divisions, and finally divorce? Of course, there are many factors, but when you boil it all down, it is harboring hurts and not meting out mercy.

We, therefore, have a choice. We can stand like the self-righteous Pharisees and little Jimmy and condemn our spouse for his or her sins. Or, we can behave like Jesus, who ate with tax collectors and sinners, and even called them to be his intimate friends and apostles. Marriages not only allow us to be recipients of mercy, but also to share it with our spouse.

Secondly, on Tuesday I was in Little Rock for the Jubilee Mass and standing in line with the bishop and other priests before Mass started. We were talking about how we try to deliver a message in each homily but people hear something totally different. Then, the bishop added, “And some say, ‘I know someone who really needs to hear that homily!’”

That is, we are quick to see how others need to change and improve, while we are slow to see our own sins and failings. That critical and condescending attitude is also, at root, a lack of meting out mercy to others. Of course, it is good to share homilies, but its main message is for me and for you.

And thirdly, people often ask me what purgatory will be like, and of course, I really do not know. But I suspect that it will involve growing in the virtue of being merciful. That is, I believe we will somehow have to face all those people – yes including our ex-spouse – and extend to them the mercy, forgiveness and friendship that we withheld from them in this life.

As Jesus declared in another passage in Matthew’s gospel, the Sermon on the Mount: “Amen, I say to you, you will not be released until you have paid the last penny” (Mt 5:26); that is, until we have lavished mercy on every last person we have ever known. We will not get out of purgatory until we have mastered how to be merciful.

Praised be Jesus Christ!