First Impressions

Allowing others to make a good first impression first

05/31/2018

Luke 1:39-56 Mary set out and traveled to the hill country in haste to a town of Judah, where she entered the house of Zechariah and greeted Elizabeth. When Elizabeth heard Mary's greeting, the infant leaped in her womb, and Elizabeth, filled with the Holy Spirit, cried out in a loud voice and said, "Most blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb. And how does this happen to me, that the mother of my Lord should come to me? For at the moment the sound of your greeting reached my ears, the infant in my womb leaped for joy. Blessed are you who believed that what was spoken to you by the Lord would be fulfilled."

How do you behave when you meet someone important for the first time? Most of us try to make a good first impression and so we feel understandably nervous. Try to recall your first job interview. Di you fret over the kind of tie you would wear, or the dress you decided to don? Did the palms of your hands sweat or beads of sweat break out on your forehead? Did you stutter when you tried to speak? I remember when I personally met Pope John Paul II for the first time in 2002. I had the chance to exchange a few words one-on-one and I was so nervous I sounded like Charlie Brown’s teacher on Peanuts, “Wah, wah, wah, wah.” I was hoping the pope thought I was speaking some obscure Indian dialect he’d never heard before. So much for first impressions.

In India whenever two people meet for the first time, they fold their hands in the prayer position and bow toward one another. They utter the word, “Namaste” almost like a prayer. The word and the bow mean that I acknowledge the divine presence in you. That’s what I should have done when I met the pope, surely I could remember one word “Namaste”! But notice the shift in emphasis of the good impression: instead of focusing on me, I turn the attention to the other person. Rather than trying to make myself look divine, I acknowledge that the other person carries a spark of God. The best first impression we can make is to let the other person make a good first impression.

The feast of the Visitation, the second Joyful Mystery of the Holy Rosary, is the meeting of two wonderful women and their two extraordinary unborn children. Mary goes to the hill country to care for her cousin Elizabeth, who’s older and pregnant, so it wasn’t easy. And how does Elizabeth greet Mary? She was more poised than I was with the pope. She exclaims: “Most blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb. And how does this happen to me that the mother of my Lord should come to me?” Elizabeth didn’t literally say “Namaste” or perhaps even fold her hands and bow, but she said essentially the same thing. Of course, Elizabeth’s greeting was the one occasion in human history when saying “Namaste” was unconditionally and absolutely true: Mary carried not a spark of God, but the veritable Son of God, the eternal Logos. Elizabeth made a great first impression – as well as John the Baptist in her womb – by allowing the focus to be on Mary and Jesus, so they made a good first impression. The best first impression is always letting the other person make a good first impression.

Let me suggest a simple way you, too, can change your attitude about making a first impression, whether it’s for a job interview or if you’re about to meet the pope. Instead of focusing overmuch on yourself, acknowledge the importance and value of the other person. Specifically, try to discover their talents, or accomplishments or gifts and compliment them on it. This is very easy to do, if we but take a moment to look around and pay attention. For instance, I visited a family for supper last night and complimented them on their landscaping when I walked in, they obviously worked hard on it. I’ll send them a little thank you note mentioning how well their children shared in the dinner conversation and how delicious the supper was. We sat and talked for almost three hours! Every time you compliment someone you are silently saying “Namaste,” I see the divine spark in you.

That’s the paradoxical things about first impressions. When you allow someone else to make a good first impression, that’s when you make the best first impression, too. And in a way, you’ll be speaking an obscure Indian dialect, too.

Praised be Jesus Christ!