Nobody to Blame

Taking full responsibility for our wrong-doings

10/11/2017

Jonah 4:1-11 Jonah was greatly displeased and became angry that God did not carry out the evil he threatened against Nineveh. He prayed, "I beseech you, LORD, is not this what I said while I was still in my own country? This is why I fled at first to Tarshish. I knew that you are a gracious and merciful God, slow to anger, rich in clemency, loath to punish. And now, LORD, please take my life from me; for it is better for me to die than to live." But the LORD asked, "Have you reason to be angry?"

             Boys and girls, the Trinity Junior High family has experienced a difficult few days. Did you hear about the fighting incident last Thursday? Several boys engaged in fighting while other boys taunted them, and still others stood around to videotape the fight. Dr. Hollenbeck, Mr. Edwards and I dealt with the misconduct with out of school suspensions, in school suspensions, no football for seventh graders for a week and revoking locker room privileges. We want the punishment to fit the crime. This incident has touched the whole Trinity family, and no one is left unaffected. Some people feel anger, others feel embarrassment, others disappointment, others surprise, and maybe others even confusion, as they try to make sense of it all. Some people are asking, “How could this happen in a Catholic school?”

              Today I want to give you three things to think about in dealing with this situation. But I also think this will come in handy in future situations, not necessarily with fighting, but whenever there’s serious wrong-doing by you or by someone else. I want you to know how to handle these tough times in life, especially how to handle them like Jesus would. The three things are: (1) everyone makes mistakes, (2) don’t play the blame game, and (3) take full responsibility for your actions. Let me elaborate a little on each of these.

               First of all, we all make mistakes, even adults make mistakes, do stupid things and sometimes even sinful things. Have you started to notice that your parents are not perfect? Duh! They don’t know everything, they can’t do everything, and they make mistakes. In other words, they are human beings just like me and you. That means you need to be patient with them, and you need to be patient with yourselves. My point is that we are all in the one big boat of broken humanity. Nobody is perfect and nobody can throw stones at another person for their sins. To be sure, this incident of fighting is a serious mistake (this is not a small thing), and that’s why the punishments are so severe. Nevertheless, I don’t want those involved to think they’re the worst people in the world (you’re not). And no one else should look down on them in judgment from some ivory tower of perceived perfection. We are all sinners in need of a Savior, and that includes this priest talking to you right now. That’s the first point: we are all sinners.

                The second point is don’t play the blame game. What is the blame game? That’s when you blame others for the mistakes you make. Have you noticed how people blame others for problems that occur? Husbands blame wives and wives blame husbands, boys blame girls and girls blame boys, people in Arkansas blame people in Oklahoma and Oklahomans blame Arkansans, and everyone blames Coach Bielema! But blaming someone else is just an easy excuse, instead of taking a hard look at ourselves. One of my favorite leadership quotations is: “Champions don’t make excuses, they make changes.” In other words, champions don’t play the blame game. They ask: what can I do differently so this doesn’t happen again? No easy excuses. Last year after a heart-breaking loss, Coach Vitale gathered together the coaches, the football players and cheerleaders, and humbly said: “Tonight’s loss is on me. This one is on me. But next Thursday is on you!” That’s a champion: don’t make easy excuses, make hard changes. That’s the second thing: don’t play the blame game.

                And thirdly, take full responsibility for your actions. William James, the Harvard professor once memorably said: “I would sin like David if I only could repent like David.” You remember how King David committed adultery with Bathsheba in the Old Testament, but then he wept bitterly over his sins and wrote the great psalm of repentance, Psalm 51, the “Miserere” (“Have Mercy, O Lord”). I have been very proud to see how the boys involved in the fighting have been a little like King David: they taken responsibility for their actions. They have not played the blame game. They know they made mistakes, like everyone else makes mistakes, and they are willing to make the hard changes. They are behaving like champions.

                  I’m going to leave you with a country music song. I love country music and it’s too bad if you don’t like country music. When you become a priest, you can play the music you like at Mass. It’s by Chris Stapleton and called, “Nobody to Blame.” It’s about a man whose wife leaves him and he takes full responsibility for the failed marriage. It’s kind of funny, too. The refrain goes: “I know right where I went wrong. I know just what got her gone. Turned my life into this country song, and I got nobody to blame but me. I got nobody to blame but me.” Listen and learn...Boys and girls, don’t turn your life into a country song, cowboy up and take responsibility for your actions. That’s what a champion would do; that’s what a Christian would do.

Praised be Jesus Christ!