Loose Grip

Holding on to everything loosely  

Ecclesiastes 1:2-11  

Vanity of vanities, says Qoheleth, vanity of vanities! All things are vanity! What profit has man from all the labor which he toils at under the sun? One generation passes and another comes, but the world forever stays. The sun rises and the sun goes down; then it presses on to the place where it rises. Blowing now toward the south, then toward the north, the wind turns again and again, resuming its rounds.   

          I had the most traumatic experience of my life when I was seven years old. But it was also the biggest blessing of my life. At the tender age of seven - the age of reason - my family left India and we moved to the United States. It was traumatic because overnight I lost my friends, my home, my school, and virtually everything else I called “my life,” in order to start a new life: with new friends, new food, and a new future that was completely unknown and unpredictable. In the midst of that trauma, I learned a powerful lesson – one that would define my life – namely, I learned that everything in this world passes. Nothing ultimately lasts. But that sad and sobering thought also made me realize the one thing that lasts forever, namely, God, and to cling tightly only to him. I believe that plane flight from New Delhi to New York was also the birth of my priestly vocation: to share with others this same insight: everything in this world ends, except God.

          Do you play tennis? Most coaches teach their students to hold the tennis racket with a loose grip. They say don’t hold it so tightly that you’d crush an egg in your hand. I learned that basic tennis lesson when I left India: hold on to everything with a loose grip.

          In the first reading today, the book of Ecclesiastes also teaches this basic tennis lesson: the loose grip. It reads: “Vanity of vanities, says Qoheleth, vanity of vanities. All things are vanity! What profit has a man from all the labor which he toils at under the sun?” In other words, look around at this world and realize all things are passing, even everything we work so hard to enjoy. Eventually, you will lose all things but One, and that is God. So what should you do? Have a loose grip on all worldly things.

          May I suggest a few ways to have a loose grip, spiritually-speaking? First, have a loose grip on yourself. People spend a fortune to look younger than they are. Of course, our bodies are “temples of the Holy Spirit,” and we should take care of them, but they won’t last forever. Have a loose grip on your youth and your good looks. Second, apply this to your relationship with family and friends, and don’t crush them with your overbearing love. As the rock band “38 Special” sang, “Just hold on loosely, But don’t let go, If you cling too tightly, You’re gonna lose control.” Healthy human relationships require a loving, loose grip. Third, have a healthy detachment from your possessions: your car, your clothes, your money and your mansion; don’t freak out if they are damaged or destroyed. You’re going to lose all these things eventually anyway.   

          Do you know what made Roger Federer one of the greatest tennis players of all time? It was his legendary forehand stroke, which he swung with a loose grip but firm wrist. Federer holds the record for most weeks ranked number one in the world: 302 weeks. His current ranking is number 7. Federer is learning to hold on to that number one ranking with a loose grip.   

          Praised be Jesus Christ!