Brideshead Revisited

Remembering the wedding of Jesus and his Bride

John 2:13-17

 Since the Passover of the Jews was near, Jesus went up to Jerusalem. He found in the temple area those who sold oxen, sheep, and doves, as well as the money-changers seated there. He made a whip out of cords and drove them all out of the temple area, with the sheep and oxen, and spilled the coins of the money-changers and overturned their tables, and to those who sold doves he said, “Take these out of here, and stop making my Father’s house a marketplace.” His disciples recalled the words of Scripture, Zeal for your house will consume me.

             We are very blessed here in Fort Smith to have two of the most beautiful churches in the diocese (the state of Arkansas): Immaculate Conception and St. Boniface.  I love their traditional, cruciform style, the stunning stained-glass windows, and the statues of saints peeking around every corner.  But I confess, I am not a fan of modern church architecture which often looks like a Pizza Hut restaurant (no offense to Pizza Hut), or a vacuous, air-plane hanger, just an open space with little spiritual sense.  Some people argue that church architecture is a matter of taste, “de gustibus non est disputandum” (there’s no arguing over taste).  They say: "I like contemporary and you like traditional; one style is as good as another."  But I disagree.  Whenever someone says that modern churches are as good as classical churches, I always ask them, “When your daughter grows up, where will she want to get married someday?  Where would she like to walk down the aisle on her wedding day?”  Of course, we know the answer: every girl dreams of getting married in a traditional-looking church, not in a Pizza Hut.

             But I believe our brides are really on to something essential about churches.  That is, a bride’s preference for a church is not just a young girl’s whimsy; rather it speaks of something spiritual and supernatural, and ultimately points to something other-worldly.  A bride always wants to marry in a traditional church because traditional churches were built according to a heavenly design.  What do I mean?  You see, traditional churches followed a pre-set pattern based on a heavenly model, on heavenly blue-prints.  Hebrews 8:5 says “Moses was warned when he was about to erect the tabernacle: ‘See that you make everything according to the pattern shown to you on the mountain’.”  And why did Moses have to follow these heavenly blue-prints exactly?  Because one day what would happen in that Temple would be a wedding, and you know, everything has to be perfect for a wedding.  If you don't believe me, just ask any mother of the bride!  You see, both old Moses and young brides understand that Temples are not a matter of personal taste; they are a matter of divine design.  God designed the heavenly Temple for the wedding of his Son, Jesus, and his Son’s bride, the Church, and every earthly temple should be an accurate replica of the heavenly one.

            In the gospel today, we see Jesus acting in a very uncharacteristic way.  Meek, mild, gentle, loving Jesus makes a whip out of a cord and drives people out of the Temple, turns over tables and sternly warns people, “Stop making my Father’s house into a marketplace.”  Someone sent me a “meme” (a little cartoon) recently, that showed this same scene, with a caption that read: “If anyone asks you ‘what would Jesus do?’ remind them that flipping over tables and chasing people with a whip is within the realm of possibility.”  But why is Jesus getting so bent out of shape over making a little money in church?  What’s the big deal?  Well, Jesus is not only a Savior, he’s also a loving groom, and he wants the Temple to be perfect for his Bride’s wedding day.  You see, Jesus knows Temples on earth should mirror the Temple in heaven, and they are all ultimately designed for a wedding day, namely, Jesus’ wedding day.

             Now, sometimes not even traditional churches nor traditional-minded priests do their job well.  One day a priest and a taxi driver both died and went to heaven.  St. Peter met them at the Pearly Gates and said to the cabbie, “Come with me.”  St. Peter led him to a huge mansion.  It had anything you could imagine from a bowling alley to an Olympic sized pool.  “Wow, thank you!” said the taxi driver.  Next, St. Peter led the priest to a rugged old shack with a bunk bed and a little old television set.  “Wait, I think you are a little mixed up,” said the priest.  “Shouldn’t I be the one who gets the mansion?  After all, I was the priest, went to church every day, and preached God’s word.”  St. Peter answered him, “Yes, that’s true.  But during your sermons people slept.  When the taxi driver drove, everyone prayed!”  So, just sitting and sleeping in a traditional-looking church is not enough; you have to actually pray while you’re here.

             My friends, every time we go to Mass on Sunday, we should go with the attitude we’re attending a wedding.  Just imagine how well everyone would dress: the men would be in suits and ties, ladies would be in dresses, boys and girls would look cute as a button, and not like Dennis the Menace.  We all wear our best to a wedding, don’t we?  And people pay attention and pray at a wedding, too.  They pray the happy couple will not mess up saying their vows, and married couples remember their own vows and pray that God will help them be faithful to each other.  And if the priest is a little more like that taxi driver, he’ll help people think about the heavenly wedding day between Jesus and his bride, and not put them to sleep.

            That’s why Pope St. John Paul II called marriage the “primordial sacrament,” because it’s the fundamental pattern of every sacrament: baptism, confession, Communion, etc. should all have seeds of marriage in them.  Every sacrament, especially the Mass, should make us feel like we’re going to a wedding.  That’s why every church building should be one a bride wants to get married in.  And that’s why Jesus got upset, because people didn’t treat the Temple according to his divine design for a wedding.  And that’s why taxi drivers who get people to pray get a higher place in heaven than priests who put people to sleep.

             Have you ever read the novel Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh?  It’s about a young man named Charles Ryder, who falls in love but never marries his beloved, a girl named Julia.  At the end of the book he returns to Julia’s home, a mansion in England, and stops to pray in the family chapel.  He reminisces about the purpose of a chapel as he stares at the red flame of the tabernacle light, he says: “Something quite remote from anything the builders intended has come out of their work…a small red flame…and there I found it this morning, burning anew among the old stones.”  You see, Charles realizes his love is not all lost: he didn’t have Julia’s love but he still had Jesus’ love; he could look forward to the heavenly wedding day.  In the very last line of the book, a junior officer tells Charles, as he comes out of the chapel, “You’re looking unusually cheerful today.”  Every time we come out of the church, we should look “usually cheerful,” too.

            Praised be Jesus Christ!

Boys Allowed

Remembering we are citizens of heaven

Philippians 3:20-4:1

But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we also await a savior, the Lord Jesus Christ. He will change our lowly body to conform with his glorified Body by the power that enables him also to bring all things into subjection to himself. Therefore, my brothers and sisters, whom I love and long for, my joy and crown, in this way stand firm in the Lord, beloved.

             When I was in grade school we had a class called “civics” and we learned about “citizenship.”  Who can tell me what a citizen is?  A citizen is someone who has full membership in a country.  It’s like girls who build a clubhouse and post a sign outside that reads: “NO BOYS ALLOWED!”  Only girls can be “citizens” of that country-club.  Now, if you’re a citizen of a country what privileges do you have that others don’t?  If you are an American citizen what can you do that those who are not American citizens cannot?  You can vote, like many people did on Tuesday.  That’s a great power and privilege.  You can become president of the United States!  How many of you want to be president?  (I don’t either.)  You can pay taxes!  The government thinks that is a privilege, but we just think it’s a pain in the royal rump.  It’s a great blessing to be an American citizen.

             In the first reading today, St. Paul talks about the best country to be a citizen of.  Does anyone know what that country is?  It’s heaven!  Is that even better than being an American citizen?  Believe it or not, it is!  What do you think will be some privileges that heavenly citizens will have?  We’ll get to ride on clouds all day and play “bumper clouds”!  We’ll get to eat pizza and Oreos all day!  We’ll get to see those who have died.  And the best thing of all is we won’t have to pay taxes!  Now there is a sad thing about heaven: boys will be allowed.  Sorry girls.

             Boys and girls, always remember you are citizens of TWO countries: America and Heaven.  That’s called having “dual citizenship.”  It’s like having one foot on earth and one foot in heaven: you belong to both countries.  I want you to remember that because America is wonderful but it’s not perfect and never will be perfect.  We've had problems in our country in the past, like slavery and we even fought a Civil War over it.  We will have problems in the future and we may fight more wars over those issues.  Of course, we always pray for our country and ask God to bless us and make this nation great.  But always remember there is only one perfect place to call home, and that is heaven.  That’s why St. Paul tells us today: “our citizenship is in heaven,” where even boys are allowed.

            Praised be Jesus Christ!

You Lucky

Finding our honor in Jesus Christ

Philippans 3:3-8A

Brothers and sisters: We are the circumcision, we who worship through the Spirit of God, who boast in Christ Jesus and do not put our confidence in flesh, although I myself have grounds for confidence even in the flesh. If anyone else thinks he can be confident in flesh, all the more can I.  Circumcised on the eighth day, of the race of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrew parentage, in observance of the law a Pharisee, in zeal I persecuted the Church, in righteousness based on the law I was blameless. But whatever gains I had, these I have come to consider a loss because of Christ. More than that, I even consider everything as a loss because of the supreme good of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.

            Have you ever seen the movie, “The Karate Kid”?  It’s about a young man who learns karate from a Japanese WWII veteran.  One day Daniel, the young man, discovers that Mr. Myiagi won the Medal of Honor in WWII.  As a gift, Daniel brings Mr. Myiagi a glass case made of rosewood to display his medal.  Daniel explains, “I got you this rosewood display box for your medals.  I thought it’d be nice to show them off or something.”  Mr. Myiagi answers, “Why, thank you, Daniel-sun.  But why show off?”  Daniel says, “Well, you know, wining the Medal of Honor means you’re brave and all that stuff.”  Mr. Myiagi takes Daniel’s hand and puts it on his chest, over his heart, and says, “This say you brave.”  Then looking at the medal, he says, “This say you lucky.”  Of course, I mean no disrespect to anyone who’s awarded the Medal of Honor.  But where does our honor, our bravery, our true worth derive from?

            In the first reading today, St. Paul tells the Philippians where to find honor, worthy and dignity, namely, in Jesus.  First, however, St. Paul lists all the “Medals of Honor” he had won as a Jew: being circumcised, being of the tribe of Benjamin, a Pharisee, and finally a persecutor of the nascent Church.  If Daniel-sun would have been a Jew, he would have made a rosewood case for St. Paul to display and show off these medals.  But here’s what St. Paul would have answered Daniel-sun: “I consider everything as a loss because of the supreme good of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.”  In other words, the only true honor we have lies in Jesus, in being his follower and disciple; anything else we’ve done only means “we lucky.”

            When people ask you who you are, how do you answer them, how do you describe yourself?  Do you list the job you hold, or the letters after your name, like CEO, or MD, or PhD?  Do you boast about your ethnic identity: “I’m Irish,” “I’m German,” “I’m Polish,” or “I’m a Suth’ner and the South will rise again!”  Or do you point to the achievements of your children and grandchildren and take pride in them, because after all, as everyone knows, “the apple CAN’T fall far from the tree.”  Patting your children on the back is surreptitiously pointing to yourself.  In other words, what are all the medals of honor you’d like to display in a rosewood case?  Rather, we should memorize Phil. 3:8, and repeat daily with St. Paul, “I consider everything as a loss because of the supreme good of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.”  Our only boast lies in being a disciple of Jesus, of knowing our Lord.

            Shortly after he was elected pope, a reporter asked Pope Francis, “Who is the new pope?”  Francis smiled and humbly answered, “I am a sinner.”  That is what each of us should answer as well, if we are honest and humble: we are sinners, we are followers of Jesus, stumbling behind him at best.  Anything else only means, “you lucky.”

Praised be Jesus Christ!

Spawn of Satan

Learning humility from the electoral process

Philippians 2:5-11

Brothers and sisters: Have among yourselves the same attitude  that is also yours in Christ Jesus, Who, though he was in the form of God, did not regard equality with God something to be grasped. Rather, he emptied himself, taking the form of a slave, coming in human likeness; and, found human in appearance, he humbled himself, becoming obedient to death, even death on a cross. Because of this, God greatly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bend, of those in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

             Today is Election Day in the United States.  Today, America, the great defender of democracy, will show the world why the democratic process is so great; why Abraham Lincoln said: “Government of the people, by the people, and for the people should not perish from this earth.”  But do you know why I personally love “Election Day”?  Because tomorrow we will see no more political ads on T.V., especially the negative ads that make the other candidate look like the “Spawn of Satan.”  Whenever I see those ads I’m repulsed, not only by the gross caricature of the candidate, but also by the candidate who allowed it, and also by how low our democratic process has sunk for someone to get elected.  I always wonder: do such ads help you get elected?  Don’t they just make BOTH candidates look like the Spawn of Satan?  Why should I vote for either candidate?  I read an essay once that argued that our current electoral process is designed specifically to root out the best and the brightest, and leave only those whom the political machine can control.  Look at it this way: could a truly Christian candidate, who refused to sling mud on the other candidate, ever get elected?  I wonder.

             In the first reading today, we see one quality of any Christian, especially one who wants to be a role-model for the whole community, namely, humility.  Philippians chapter 2 is the great “hymn of humility,” and describes Jesus by saying, “he humbled himself and took the form of a slave,” but then “God greatly exalted him and bestowed on him a name above any other name.”  In other words, a real Christian (who imitates Christ) doesn’t brag about himself or herself, and certainly refrains from belittling another person.  Rather, he or she let’s God lift them high.  You see, when you call another person the “Spawn of Satan,” you’ve only managed to sink into the same mud your slinging at the other person.  As we said in grade school, “It takes one to know one.”

             If there’s only one lesson this political season should teach us, it’s that slinging mud only makes both candidates filthy.  Or, as Gandhi eloquently said: “An eye for an eye only makes the whole world blind.”  But we don’t have to run for president of the United States to sling mud.  We do that every day in our conversations: when we criticize and complain about our co-workers, our boss, our in-laws, our spouses, and maybe even our priests!  When we see how destructive and just plain dumb political ads are, we should be resolved not to do likewise ourselves.  Let us stop our own mud-slinging campaigns against each other.  Rather, let us humble ourselves, and one day, maybe God will greatly exalt us.

            Praised be Jesus Christ!

Undiscovered Country

Praying for our beloved dead

2 Maccabees 12:43-46

Judas Maccabeus then took up a collection among all his soldiers, amounting to two thousand silver drachmas, which he sent to Jerusalem to provide for an expiatory sacrifice. In doing this he acted in a very excellent and noble way, in as much as he had the resurrection in mind; for if he were not expecting the fallen to rise again, it would have been superfluous and foolish to pray for the dead. But if he did this with a view to the splendid reward that awaits those who had gone to rest in godliness, it was a holy and pious thought. Thus he made atonement for the dead that they might be absolved from their sin.

             Have I told you lately how much I love being pastor of Immaculate Conception Church?  Well, here’s the latest reason why I believe this parish is so great.  I’ve done a lot of funerals lately, at the pace of one or sometimes two a week.  My niece likes to call our parish, “I.C.U.” because we do have a lot of people in the Intensive Care Unit!  But do you know what happens the days following a funeral?  The church office here is flooded with Mass intentions for that person who just died.  You may have noticed in the bulletin each week that a specific Mass is “offered” for a specific person.  For example, after Sally Johnston’s funeral we had tons of “Mass intentions” to pray for her.  After Bob Raible died, again we scheduled lots of Masses to be said for him.  So, I figure, “Hey, if I die as the pastor of Immaculate Conception Church, there will be hundreds of Masses said for me!  Sweet!”  You see, I.C. parishioners really love to pray for the dead because they really love those who have died.

             Now, let me ask you a very important question: WHY do we pray for the dead, and even have Masses offered for them?  It’s really a very odd thing, isn’t it?  And, as it turns out, it’s really a very Catholic thing.  Here’s the reason: we pray for the dead because we believe they may be in purgatory, and purgatory is a curiously Catholic concept.  Think about it this way: if the dead were already in heaven, our prayers for them would be superfluous, unnecessary, like offering water to a man who’s already drinking champagne!  Heavenly souls would say, “Thanks for your prayers but no thanks!  I got something better!”  On the other hand, if they are in hell – God forbid! – then our prayers will not do them any good, will they?  Their fate is sealed; they have taken “the escalator down,” sort of say.  So, we believe our beloved dead must be somewhere else, not in heaven but also not in hell, rather they are in a special third place where Masses can benefit them, like a cup of cold water offered to a thirsty man.  We call that place “Purgatory.”  That’s another reason I love Immaculate Conception Church: you people really pray for the dead, and one day, I’ll be one of those dead who needs your prayers.  Please remember me!

            You know, sometimes people ask me, “Father John, will you please celebrate my funeral Mass?”  I always answer, “Of course I will but only on one condition: you have to go first!”  But you know, one day, I will go first, before some of you, into what Hamlet called “the undiscovered country,” that land that lies beyond death, and I hope those who are left behind me will pray for me.  I hope that undiscovered country for me will be a place called Purgatory.

            That’s why today’s first reading is from the second book of Maccabees.  2 Maccabees 12:43-46 is the “locus classicus” (the basic Scriptural citation) for the Catholic Church’s teaching on purgatory.  If anyone asks you where in the Bible it talks about “purgatory,” please point them to these valuable verses.  Even though the word “purgatory” doesn’t appear there, it’s obvious that purgatory is what the inspired author is talking about.  By the way, this is also the reason why Martin Luther, the Protestant Reformer, wanted to remove the books of Maccabees from the Bible because its teaching about purgatory is clear and irrefutable.  In this passage we see Judas Maccabeus acting very Catholic!  He was the leader of the Jewish revolt against the Romans back in 165 BC and he takes up a collection for sacrificial offerings to be made for his dead soldiers.  That would be the Old Testament equivalent of having a Mass offered for them!  And verse 45 says, “He did this with a view to the splendid reward that awaits those who had gone to rest in godliness, it was a holy and pious thought.”  You see, Judas Maccabeus would have made a perfect parishioner of Immaculate Conception Church.  Why?  Well, because he loved to pray for the dead because he loved the dead.  He believed in an Undiscovered Country called Purgatory.

            I know that death and purgatory are heavy subjects, so let me lighten things up a little here.  Bobby was sitting next to his grandpa when he innocently asked him, “Grandpa do you know how to make animal sounds?”  “I sure do,” Grandpa replied.  “What sort of animal sound would you like to hear?”  “Bobby replied, “How about a toad?  Do you know how to sound like a toad?”  “Sure,” said Grandpa, cupping his hands to his mouth, “Croaak, croaak.  How did you like that?”  “Yipee!” screamed Bobby, jumping up and down, “We’re going to Miami!”  “Huh?” questioned Grandpa.  “Why’s that?”  Bobby answered, “Because Grandma said so.  She said that after you croak we’ll all go to Miami!”  You know, I am so glad I don’t have my own children!  Of course, we should not just be interested in where WE’LL go after someone dies, but we should also care where our beloved dead go when they die.  Where are they??  One real and very likely possibility for our beloved dead is a place called purgatory.  But here’s what even more amazing, and to me, a great consolation: we can actually speed up that process of purification and perfection of the poor souls in purgatory by our prayers, especially the Mass.  That’s what Judas Maccabeus did and that’s what I.C. parishioners do because they love the dead.

            Hamlet said in his soliloquy: “The dread of something after death, The undiscovered country, from whose bourn no traveler returns, puzzles the will.”  But, you know, our wills are not puzzled because we know the landscape of that undiscovered country, a special part of which is called Purgatory, a place of purification and perfection.  Today let us pray for our beloved dead, so that tomorrow someone will pray for us.

            Praised be Jesus Christ!

Good Slavery

Becoming slaves of Jesus Christ

Philippians 1:1-11

Paul and Timothy, slaves of Christ Jesus, to all the holy ones in Christ Jesus who are in Philippi, with the bishops and deacons: grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

            Boys and girls, how many of you believe slavery is a good thing?  How many of you even know what slavery is??  Who can tell me what a slave is?  A slave is someone who has a master who tells them what to do.  Can a slave do whatever they want?  No.  Slaves must obey their masters.  It’s like that game “Simon Says.”  You have to do whatever Simon tells you.  If Simon says, “Jump on one leg.”  You must jump on one leg.  If Simon tells you, “Pick your nose!”  You must pick your nose!  If you disobey Simon, what happens?  You lose the game!  Simon Says is modern day slavery!  Now, that’s just a game, and we’re only having fun.  But do you think it’s good to be a slave in real life?

            Do you know someone who thought slavery WAS a good thing?  It was St. Paul!  Listen to how he begins his letter to the Philippians.  He say, “Paul and Timothy, SLAVES of Jesus Christ, to all the holy ones in Philippi.”  Both Paul and Timothy were slaves!  Now, to whom did St. Paul say he was a slave, who was his “master”?  Jesus.  Do you think Jesus would be a good master?  Yes, he’s the best master, because he only tell us to do what is best for us.  He never tell us to pick our nose!

            Now, boys and girls, there are two kinds of slavery: “good slavery” and “bad slavery.”  Good slavery is when Jesus is your master and you obey him.  St. Paul teaches us about this good slavery, by offering us his example.  How many of you want to be a slave of Jesus Christ?  Good!  Bad slavery is when we are slaves to anything or anyone else besides Jesus.  For example, I am a slave to coffee!  I must have coffee everyday and all the time, or I think I will die!  That is bad slavery.  Some people are slaves to American Girl dolls.  They must have ALL the American Girl dolls, and ALL their outfits, and ALL their accessories!  That is bad slavery.  Some people are slaves to football.  They watch football on T.V., they play only football, they talk about only football, they EAT footballs!  That is bad slavery.  Some people are slaves to their phones.  They never leave home without it.  They may leave their home without their pants on, but they will NEVER leave their homes without their phones.  They believe they will die without it.  That is bad slavery.  We can be slaves to exercise, we can be slaves to money, we can be slaves to our children – because we always do what they want.  All these things are bad slavery because someone or something else is our "master" telling us what to do.

            You see, boys and girls, we are all slaves to someone or something.  The only question is: who is your master?  There is only one kind of slavery that is good, and only one Master who is good.  And it isn't coffee.

            Praised be Jesus Christ!

A Many-Splendored Love

On the Feast of Pope St. John Paul II

 22 October 2014

The poets love to sing that, “Love is a many splendored thing.”  Indeed, love can fly you to the moon, or dump you in the depths of despair.  We can try to run from love and its strange power over us, but we cannot hide.  Pope St. John Paul II went so far as to say, “Man [and woman] cannot live without love.”  We can live without television, we can live without alcohol, we can live without sunsets over the Pacific Ocean, but we cannot live without love.  Without love, we will die.  In his penetrating book, Man’s Search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl gave powerful proof of how clinging to love helped many survive the Nazi concentration camps.  Without love, we will die; with love, we are stronger than death.

But what is love, this “many splendored thing”?  The Scriptures tell us where to start: “For this is love: not that we have loved God, but that he has loved us” (1 John 4:10).  That passage has baffled me for years (and still does), but here’s one interpretation: love isn’t something WE do first, but rather something GOD does first, and therefore something God has to teach us.  In other words, we make many mistakes trying to love others.  Just think of all the ways you failed today: we love some people too much (like our children) and we love other people too little (like our enemies).  So God has to show us how to love properly and perfectly.  What does God teach us about love?  St. John continues, “And [God] sent his son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.”  That is, God loves us for our benefit, not for His own good.  Genuine, true love seeks first and foremost the good of the beloved, not its own good (although the lover certainly benefits in the balance).  Love – at least, God-style love – is unselfish, and because it is unselfish it feels like a sacrifice, it’s hard, it hurts.  “He sent his son as a sacrifice.”  At the heart of every true love is a gift: something I freely and joyfully (often sacrificially) do for you.  That is the first and most important lesson of love.

Love again glitters in the limelight as the question of love’s institutional expression, namely, marriage, grabbed the attention of the Supreme Court of the United States.  The SCOTUS recently ruled that certain federal benefits should be granted to same-sex couples, and declined to rule on California’s Proposition 8, which effectively allowed same-sex marriage in that state, as well as every other state.  Since then, state after state has conceded legal status to same-sex couples, and I believe the trend will continue and gain momentum.  But here’s the fundamental problem: our culture and our country lack the philosophical and constitutional principles to successfully stave off same-sex marriage becoming “the new normal.”  Why is that?  As far back as 1831, Alexis de Tocqueville made a piercing and prophetic observation in his book Democracy in America, saying, “America is therefore one of the countries in the world where philosophy is least studied, and where the precepts of Descartes are best applied.”  How so?  He continued, “Everyone shuts himself up in his own breast, and affects from that point to judge the world.”  We “shut ourselves up in our own breast” when love is what WE believe it is rather than letting God teach us what HE believes it is.  President John F. Kennedy summarized accurately the prevailing American view of the separation of religion from political life when, on September 12, 1960, he addressed the Greater Houston Ministerial Association.  He said: “Whatever issue may come before me as President--on birth control, divorce, censorship, gambling or any other subject--I will make my decision in accordance with these views [that is, the absolute separation of church and state], in accordance with what my conscience tells me to be the national interest, and without regard to outside religious pressures or dictates.  And no power or threat of punishment could cause me to decide otherwise.”  While Kennedy’s speech is laudable in many respects – and helped him get elected! – it also evicted religion from its rightful role in the public square.  When we refuse to allow God to teach us about love, whether through Christianity or any other “religious megaphone” God uses to speak to the world, “we shut ourselves up in our own breast.”  We grope blindly in the dark, trying to grasp at love either through trial and error, or democratic vote, or judicial fiat, but we will come up short.  We cannot figure out what love is on our own; God must teach us.

Don’t misunderstand me, I don’t advocate throwing in the political towel, or feel like Don Quixote charging a windmill.  While it may be unlikely to stop same-sex marriage gaining ground, some compromise solution is still possible and desirable, like granting benefits to couples but not calling it marriage, or individual states not capitulating or compromising at all, or strengthening traditional marriages, etc.  But I’m not holding my breath.  In the United States and much of western civilization, love will indeed be a many splendored thing.

How do we live in this increasingly atheistic culture, where God’s voice is “anathema” in the public square?  Let’s go back to Pope St. John Paul II, who said, “Man cannot live without love.”  I have several friends who are homosexual.  They are sincere, courageous Catholics and I love them dearly.  John Paul’s statement is as true for them as for the couple happily married for 50 years.  Homosexual persons cannot live without love.  For that matter, celibate priests cannot live without love (in case you’re wondering).  But we don’t crack the code of love without divine help.  We Christians also look to Scripture that says love is a sacrificial gift; it seeks the benefit of my beloved before my own happiness (and often at the price of my own immediate happiness).  That’s one reason I chose to be a celibate priest, sacrificing my sexuality puts the needs of the parish above my own desires.  That’s why dating couples choose chastity, seeking the holiness of their boyfriend or girlfriend at a painful personal price.  But that’s the hard road; it’s the way of the cross.  Not only is it hard to choose that, it’s confounding to comprehend WHY we should.  That’s why God has to teach us what love is.  Love is not what we think it is; love is what God thinks it is.

For all who struggle to love – pretty much the whole human race – the best way to learn about love is to fall in love with Jesus first.  Our Lord must be our “Significant Other,” and our most Significant Other.  One day, a scribe asked Jesus, “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment?”  Jesus replied, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.  This is the first and greatest commandment.”  Once you’ve mastered that, you can move on to the second commandment, “love your neighbor as yourself” (Mt. 22:37-39).  I firmly believe that anyone who loves God with all their heart and all their soul and all their mind will choose what’s best for their beloved instead of what they want for themselves, they will sacrifice their own desires (even sexual desires).  Once you’ve learned to love God (and obey His teachings), you’ll be in a better position to love your neighbor (even your same-sex neighbor).  Maybe a similar conviction inspired St. Augustine to make the daring statement, “Love, and do what you will.”  I am convinced that any person who loves Jesus (not the Jesus of our imagination, but the real Jesus) with that kind of intensity will choose either heterosexual marriage or refrain from sexual activity.  Dag Hammerskjold, secretary-general of the United Nations (1953-1961), voluntarily chose celibacy for the sake of world peace.  Mahatma Gandhi and his wife chose to be celibate for the sake of Indian independence.  Same-sex couples, while remaining in a deeply committed and warmly loving relationship (maybe even enjoying the civil status of marriage), should refrain from sexual activity out of love for God, and love for each other.  Love – God-style love – seeks the good of the beloved, often at a steep personal cost.  Any other “love” is a chimera of our own making.

Anyway, when we get to heaven, all bets will be off on marriage because there won’t be any marriage, same-sex or otherwise.  “At the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage but are like the angels in heaven” (Mt. 22: 30) – that, by the way, is the real Jesus talking.  Here’s a snap-shot of heaven: in some mysterious, mystical way, all humanity will comprise the corporate “Bride” and our one “Spouse” will be Christ.  In heaven the heterosexuals don’t win, and the homosexuals won’t win.  Only those who love Jesus will win.  Celibate priesthood anyone?