Feminine Fascination

Holding womanly hands to learn the feminine genius

11/19/2017

Proverbs 31:10-13, 19-20, 30 When one finds a worthy wife, her value is far beyond pearls. Her husband, entrusting his heart to her, has an unfailing prize. She brings him good, and not evil, all the days of her life. She obtains wool and flax and works with loving hands. She puts her hands to the distaff, and her fingers ply the spindle. She reaches out her hands to the poor, and extends her arms to the needy. Charm is deceptive and beauty fleeting; the woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

      Let me tell you the story about a young bishop who lived in Rome many years ago. This bishop had the unusual habit of walking around the Vatican with a rosary wrapped around his hand. Whenever people saw him, his rosary was wrapped around his hand. One day an archbishop’s curiosity got the better of him and he stopped the young bishop and asked him about his habit. It takes an archbishop to question a bishop. The young bishop smiled and said: “The rosary makes me feel like the Blessed Virgin Mary is holding my hand and guiding me and leading me through life.” Later that young bishop became an archbishop himself, and a little later he was promoted to cardinal. In 1978 he was actually elected as the pope, and took the name “John Paul II.” On his papal coat of arms, John Paul had the golden letter “M” for Mary in the bottom corner. She was still guiding him through life, even though he was the pope!

        Pope John Paul II had a tender love not only for Mary, but for all women, because he believed they possessed a particular “feminine genius.” Think of it like woman’s intuition on steroids. He explained this once saying: “Perhaps more than men, women acknowledge the person, because they see persons with their hearts. They see them independently of various ideological or political systems. They see others in their greatness and limitations; they try to go out to them and help them” (Letter to Women, no. 12). By the way, that’s why women are adept at remembering birthdays and anniversaries, and they know who is related to whom in Fort Smith, and they watch soap operas, because all those things highlight persons and their inter-relationships. Many men, on the other hand, just see people as cogs in a machine to make money, whether they’re a good head football coach or not. Women immediately and instinctively see the spiritual side of a person, and that’s their feminine genius.

        The first reading today is a kind of “ode to women” taken from Proverbs 31, the great chapter describing the “ideal wife.” I believe Proverbs 31 could easily have been written by Pope John Paul II because both the pope and Proverbs are fascinated with the feminine. The lines I like the best from this chapter read: “She reaches out her hand to the poor, and extends her arms to the needy. Charm is deceptive and beauty fleeting; the woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” Notice how the ideal wife-woman “reaches out her hand,” which is how John Paul II imagined the Blessed Virgin Mary reaching out her hand to guide him through life when he held the rosary. And when the Proverbs wife-woman takes us by the hand, she teaches us not to be deceived by external charm or beauty but to see the spiritual side of people. That’s the genius of women.

       My friends, let me suggest three areas where we, like John Paul II, need the feminine genius to lead us by the hand. First of all, in not putting an inordinate emphasis on physical beauty and appearance. Obviously, we need to take care of our bodies as temples of the Holy Spirit, but we shouldn’t obsess over them. How many teenage girls suffer from bulimia or anorexia believing they are overweight when in reality they are underweight? Have you ever heard the expression, “He has a face only a mother could love”? Maybe so.  But if so, then we need a mother with her feminine genius to “reach out her hand” and teach us how to love all faces, not just the charming ones or the beautiful ones.

         Secondly, let the Church provide her feminine genius when you are facing complicated issues in life. How do we understand or think about same-sex marriage, or capital punishment, or immigration, or pro-life, or racism, or any number of other issues deeply divisive and difficult to discern? Turn to Holy Mother Church, to the feminine. Do you know what pronoun is used throughout the Mass to refer to the Church? The Church is not referred to as an “It” and it’s not “He,” and it’s not “They” and it’s not “All of y’all.” Rather, the Church is always “She” and “Her.” Why? Well, because the Church is the Bride of Christ, and she longs to teach us her feminine genius that she has learned from the Holy Spirit. Read what Pope Francis and Bishop Taylor write on these issues, and you will learn the feminine genius of the Church.

          And thirdly, do what that young bishop did walking around Rome: pray the rosary and hold Mother Mary’s hand. I’ve gotten into the habit of walking around the church offices while I pray the rosary each day. Sometimes I startle the staff as I suddenly appear around the corner, but I tell them, “Don’t worry, I’m praying for you.” By the way, I don’t suggest you pray the rosary while driving your car because it may cause drowsiness and a wreck. Some people pray the rosary while lying in bed, and if they fall asleep, their Guardian Angel finishes it for them. The important thing, though, is to see in Mary the epitome of the feminine genius, and let her “reach out her hand” to take yours and guide you. This should be the root of all sound Marian devotion.

          When our school children cross Rogers Avenue on the way to Mass, we teach them to hold hands, because it’s dangerous. My friends, we cannot make it through life without holding other people’s hands as well, because life is dangerous. But when you hold the hand of a woman, you also begin to learn their feminine genius, whether that woman is your wife, or Holy Mother Church, or the Blessed Virgin Mary. A woman’s hand can help you across Rogers, and across the Vatican, and across life, and she will guide you all the way to heaven.

Praised be Jesus Christ!