Following the extraordinary example of Daphrose Rugamba
08/03/2025
Luke 12:13-21 Someone in the
crowd said to Jesus, “Teacher, tell my brother to share the inheritance with
me.” He replied to him, “Friend, who appointed me as your judge and
arbitrator?” Then he said to the crowd, “Take care to guard against all greed,
for though one may be rich, one’s life does not consist of possessions.” Then
he told them a parable. “There was a rich man whose land produced a bountiful
harvest. He asked himself, ‘What shall I do, for I do not have space to store
my harvest?’ And he said, ‘This is what I shall do: I shall tear down my barns
and build larger ones. There I shall store all my grain and other goods and I
shall say to myself, “Now as for you, you have so many good things stored up
for many years, rest, eat, drink, be merry!”’ But God said to him, ‘You fool,
this night your life will be demanded of you; and the things you have prepared,
to whom will they belong?’ Thus will it be for all who store up treasure for
themselves but are not rich in what matters to God.”
Two weeks ago a friend, Dc. Angelo
Volpi, handed me a book his wife, Lorel Wilhelm-Volpi, had written called
Important Women of the 20th Century. Lorel rapidly reviewed the stories of 16
heroic women who lived their faith in extraordinary ways under excruciating
circumstances. Angelo gave the book to Bishop Taylor who read one biography a
day and completed the book in 16 days. I had to beat the bishop, so I read it
in 7 days! Otherwise, what’s the point of the priesthood?
One of the 16 women touched my
heart deeply: Daphrose Rugamba from Rwanda. Daphrose was born in 1944 and
raised in a devout Catholic family. She was ethnically Tutsi, and married
Cyprien Rugamba, a talented musician, poet, and choreographer. They had 9
children together. Unfortunately, Cyprien was unfaithful to Daphrose and had a
child out of wedlock.
But Daphrose did not give up;
instead, she not only forgave Cyprien’s adultery, she even adopted his son. In
1989 they established the Emmanuel Community to emphasize the dignity of each
person, regardless of their ethnicity. They warmly welcomed both Tutsis and
Hutus – bitter enemies in Rwanda – to join their Emmanuel Community and learn
to live in peace with your enemy.
But on April 6, 1994, after they
spent the night in Eucharistic Adoration, praying for peace, Hutu militia
entered their family chapel and killed Daphrose, Cyprien, and 6 of their
children. Lorel recounted the scene in her book: “The assassins gunned down the
family and then fired into the tabernacle. When the Rugamba’s bodies were
discovered they were covered with [consecrated] hosts.”
In other words, Daphrose was a
living (and dying) icon of how to prioritize relationships above everything
else. For example, she prized her husband and forgave his infidelity. She
adored her family and not only had 9 children but adopted her husband’s child.
She treasured the Rwandan people regardless of race. And she loved God above
all who helped her to even love her enemies, the Hutus who murdered her.
In the gospel today, Jesus teaches
the people how to put relationships before riches like Daphrose did. We read:
“Someone in the crowd said to Jesus: “Teacher, tell my brother to share the
inheritance with me.” That is, money mattered more to this man than the blood
relationship with his brother. He put riches above relationships. By contrast,
Jesus insists that we should be “rich in what matters to God.” And what matters
most to God? Simple: our relationships with God and neighbor.
I would suggest to you that
Daphrose Rugamba’s heroic and holy life can serve as a paradigm (or pattern) of
how to be “rich in what matters to God” in three ways. First, Daphrose
prioritized her family. In what ways can you enhance your family relationships?
Some families attend Sunday Mass together and go out for breakfast or gather at
their home.
Jeff and Norma Meares prepare
breakfast for their kids and grands after the 7:30 a.m. Mass. The grandkids
love breakfast at Poppy’s. Perhaps there’s a strained or broken relationship
with a family member that needs mending. Take a bite of humble pie and say,
“I’m sorry.” Or far more difficult, say, “I forgive you,” instead of
obstinately holding on to old hurts.
Second, as Daphrose loved different
ethnic groups, are there races that are hard to relate to for you? And by the
way, we may feel we love everyone equally while we also harbor a spirit of
superiority over them. How so? It’s a good thing to feel national pride as
Americans but do we also sometimes believe that we are better than other
countries and ethnicities?
As a child, I saw first-hand this
subtle superiority in India. Growing up I could tell it was more desirable to
be light-skinned than dark-skinned. Can you guess why? India had been ruled by
the British for virtually 200 years. And like in the Stockholm syndrome, we
Indians began to copy our British captors. We felt being light-skinned like
them was better than being dark-skinned like us. Now though we get our revenge
as all the white people go to the beach every summer to look like us brown
people. Ha!
And third, as Daphrose emphasized
her relationship with God, so we should find ways to strengthen our love for
the Lord. That is, do things for Jesus because you want to not bcause you have
to. For example, attend a weekday Mass, pray the rosary, listen to Catholic
podcasts while driving, fast from all social media on Fridays.
By the way, thank you all for
responding so generously to Fr. Samy’s mission appeal for his diocese back in
May. Bishop Prakasam wrote a heart-felt letter of gratitude, saying: “The
generous contributions of I.C. Church will help us educate poor children,
evangelize illiterate people in rural villages, and care for leper patients.”
That collection was our faith in action, where we gave because we wanted to,
not because we had to.
My friends, we may not be called to
a martyr’s death like Daphrose Rugamba, who died covered in consecrated Hosts.
Nonetheless, we can imitate her virtues, by prioritizing relationships over
riches. When our relationships with family, with others who are different, and
with God are robust and revitalizing, we become truly “rich in what matters to
God.”
Praised be Jesus
Christ!
