My Theologian Mother

Learning our faith from our parents

07/19/2022

MT 12:46-50 While Jesus was speaking to the crowds, his mother and his brothers appeared outside, wishing to speak with him. Someone told him, “Your mother and your brothers are standing outside, asking to speak with you.” But he said in reply to the one who told him, “Who is my mother? Who are my brothers?” And stretching out his hand toward his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my heavenly Father is my brother, and sister, and mother.”

We all learn our faith from our parents as little children. But in my case, my parents continue to teach me about the Catholic faith even after I am an adult and even an ordained Catholic priest. For example, my mom has taught me better than trained theologians and Bible scholars the meaning of the gospel today from Mt 12:46-50. Jesus is teaching the crowds in a synagogue, and someone says that his mother and brothers would like a word with him. But Jesus explains that his true family is not his earthly family of flesh and blood but his heavenly family, those united by the bond of doing the Father’s will.

How did my mom teach me the meaning of this passage? Now that my parents live in Springdale, I am able to see them a little more often. They are only an hour’s drive away. But sometimes I cannot stay very long because of a commitment here at the parish. My mom always says: “Don’t worry about us. We understand that you are a priest. Go back and take care of your parishioners. That is your priority.”

Most parents make their children feel guilty about not coming to see them more often. My parents make me feel guilty about not putting my heavenly family first and my earthly family second. And that is the meaning of Mt 12:46-50: prioritizing our heavenly family – our brothers and sisters in Christ – over our earthly family. Thank you, mom, the best theologian in our family!

I also need to address a common confusion surrounding this passage that often pits Protestants against Catholics. Do you know what that bone of contention is? It is the phrase “Jesus’ brothers”. Why is that phrase so controversial? Well, our Protestant brothers and sisters take that phrase to mean that the Blessed Virgin Mary had other natural children, besides Jesus. That is, Jesus is her “firstborn son”, which implies that there was a second born and a third born, and so forth.

Catholics, on the other hand, want to defend the perpetual virginity of Mary and so insist that phrase “brothers of Jesus” really refers to Jesus’ “cousins” – you said “brother” when you meant “cousin” in Jesus’ day. Or, perhaps they were children that St. Joseph had from a previous marriage and so he was a widower when he married Mary. In that case, the brothers of Jesus would be his “step-brothers”. Can you see how this could be confusing to the ordinary Christian?

Whenever I try to untie these tight theological knots, I always ask not only what do people argue in a debate, but why are they arguing for that side of the debate? In other words, why do the Protestants want to show Mary had other children and why do Catholics want to protect her perpetual virginity? I think the underlying interest of Protestants in showing Mary had other children besides Jesus is to show she was an ordinary, normal woman that needed to be saved. And nothing shows someone’s normalcy than sexual intimacy. Normal people get married, have sexual relations, and bear children. Hence, the literal “brothers of Jesus”. See, our Protestant friends would argue, Mary is ordinary.

Catholics, by contrast, want to show that Mary is not normal or ordinary, but rather exception and extraordinary. And how are we going to prove that? Well, that is why we argue that Mary married St. Joseph, but never engaged in marital relations with him but remained a perpetual virgin. And how can we demonstrate that Mary never had relations with Joseph?

We have to argue that “the brothers of Jesus” must mean his cousins or step-brothers from Joseph’s previous marriage. Nothing shows that someone is superhuman than their ability to control their sexual appetites. Mary, too, needed to be saved, but that occurred at her Immaculate Conception. The more our culture becomes a sex-soaked society, the stronger both the Protestant and Catholic arguments become.

Soon after my parents moved into their new home in Springdale, they put a garden statue of Mother Mary in their front yard. Whenever I drive up to their house, I think: “Wow, that blue and white statue really sticks out in their neighborhood! I wonder what the neighbors think?” In her own humble way, my mom was answering the debate about Mary’s perpetual virginity.

In my mom’s eyes, Mary is not normal; she is exceptional and extraordinary, and she is like no woman on earth who has ever lived. That is why there is a statue of my Mary in my mom’s front yard: not because Mary had other natural children besides, but because we are all Mary’s supernatural children by faith. My mom is the smartest theologian I know.

Praised be Jesus Christ!

 

Vacation on the Moon

Learning how to take a vocation vacation

07/16/2022

MT 12:14-21 The Pharisees went out and took counsel against Jesus to put him to death. When Jesus realized this, he withdrew from that place. Many people followed him, and he cured them all, but he warned them not to make him known. This was to fulfill what had been spoken through Isaiah the prophet: Behold, my servant whom I have chosen, my beloved in whom I delight; I shall place my Spirit upon him, and he will proclaim justice to the Gentiles. He will not contend or cry out, nor will anyone hear his voice in the streets. A bruised reed he will not break, a smoldering wick he will not quench, until he brings justice to victory. And in his name the Gentiles will hope.

Every summer I remind Catholics: “Do not take a vacation from your vocation!” That means be sure to go to mass on Sunday, even if you are on vacation on the beach, or in the mountains, or on the moon! No vacation from your vocation. But nine years ago, I took a “vocation vacation” for three months, my vacation was all about my vocation. That is, I spent three months discerning whether God was calling me to be a Carmelite friar.

Since today is the memorial of Our Lady of Mount Carmel, and the feast day of the Carmelite Order, perhaps it is apropos to share a little of my vocation vacation. I had not gone to the beach or to the mountains but spiritually-speaking I had “gone to the moon”. The moon is a beautiful symbol of Mother Mary, who receives all her light from Jesus, her Son. She shines because of Jesus, and so, too, do the Carmelites who imitate her, and so too should all Christians.

I spent my vocation vacation in Dallas, Texas, at Little Flower Church, a parish run by Carmelite friars in a poor part of Dallas. The church parking lot was surrounded by a 10-foot tall fence with an electronic sliding gate. That gives you an idea of the neighborhood. The parish ran a small school that struggled to stay open, like lots of Catholic schools these days. But my purpose was not to be a parish priest and get involved in church activities, but rather to learn the art of contemplative prayer.

That is prayer of silence, stillness and solitude. It is a very powerful kind of prayer because it does not involve a lot of doing but a lot of being. Contemplation is not about how many rosaries you pray or how many novenas you can crank out or how many Masses you attend, or retreats you go to. All those things are good, but contemplation is different. It is not about what we do, but about what God does.

And our job in prayer is to sit still long enough for the Divine Physician to do his healing and holiness work. That is why surgeons put people into deep sleep with anesthesia before they operate. They need us to lie still, almost asleep, for them to do their work and so we do not interfere. In contemplation, God heals us, and we don’t know how he does it, and we don’t even know we are sick and in need of radical surgery.

Would you like to hear a little about how and why the Carmelites were founded as a religious order? Most people think they started in the mid-1200’s when a group of Crusaders and pilgrims to the Holy Land decided to hang up their swords and live like hermits on Mt. Carmel in northwestern Israel, overlooking the Mediterranean Sea. And that is true for the most part.

But Carmelites know that their real founder was the prophet Elijah in the Old Testament. In 1 Kings 18, Elijah battles 450 false prophets who worshipped Baal on Mt. Carmel. After Elijah defeats them, he puts all the false prophets to the sword and kills them. Carmelites follow in the footsteps of Elijah, but they take the sword of the Spirit to slay the false prophets in their own hearts. The really dangerous prophets are inside of us, not outside.

So, these Crusaders and pilgrims in the 13th century had put down one sword but picked up another and plunged it into their hearts. And that is what I was attempting to do in my vocation vacation in Dallas for three months. I tried to learn contemplative prayer so God could do radical surgery on me, and cut me open, and do open heart surgery with the sword of the Spirit, and heal me of ills I don’t even know I suffer from.

My friends, would you like to take a little vocation vacation yourself? You don’t have to travel to the Holy Land and sit atop Mt. Carmel like Elijah, or spend three months in Dallas like me. Just go to your room, close your door, and close your eyes, and try to sit still and don’t interfere with the work of the divine Physician.

Perhaps these words of St. John of the Cross, the great Carmelite mystic, will inspire you: “To reach satisfaction in all, desire the possession of nothing. To arrive at being all, desire to be nothing. To come to the knowledge of all, desire the knowledge of nothing.” St. John continued: “To enjoy what you have not, you must go by a way in which you know not. To come to the knowledge you have not, you must go by a way in which you know not. To come to the possession you have not, you must go by a way in which you possess not. To come to be what you are not, you must go by a way in which you are not.”

The next time you want to take a vacation, I suggest you not go to the beach, or to the mountains, but rather go to the moon! And the fastest way to the moon is by going to your room, “close the door, and pray to your Father in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will repay you” (Mt 6:6).

Praised be Jesus Christ!

Stepping into a Story

Learning how to be human and compassionate

07/10/2022

Lk 10:25-37 There was a scholar of the law who stood up to test Jesus and said, "Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?" But because he wished to justify himself, he said to Jesus, "And who is my neighbor?" Jesus replied, "A man fell victim to robbers as he went down from Jerusalem to Jericho. They stripped and beat him and went off leaving him half-dead. A priest happened to be going down that road, but when he saw him, he passed by on the opposite side. Likewise a Levite came to the place, and when he saw him, he passed by on the opposite side. But a Samaritan traveler who came upon him was moved with compassion at the sight. He approached the victim, poured oil and wine over his wounds and bandaged them. Then he lifted him up on his own animal, took him to an inn, and cared for him. The next day he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper with the instruction, 'Take care of him. If you spend more than what I have given you, I shall repay you on my way back.' Which of these three, in your opinion, was neighbor to the robbers' victim?" He answered, "The one who treated him with mercy." Jesus said to him, "Go and do likewise."

It has been many years since I went to Disney World. If I were ever to go again, I would love to go to Universal Studios and take one of those “movie rides”. Have you ever been on one of those rollercoaster movie rides? Let me share some lines from my favorite actors and see if you can guess which movie the line is from. This homily is going to be like one of those movie rides.

Here’s Humphrey Bogart, who pounds his fist on a table and says: “Of all the gin-joints in all the towns in all the world, and she had to walk into mine!” That classic line was from the movie “Casablanca”. Here’s Tim Robbins speaking sadly with Morgan Freeman, saying: “I guess it comes down to a simple choice, really. Get busy living or get busy dying.” Of course, everyone knows that famous line from “Shawshack Redemption”.

Okay, here’s the best for last. Russell Crowe, who throws down his sword and jeers at the crowd, shouting: “Are you not entertained? Are you not entertained? Is this not why you are here!?” I have always wanted to ask that after a homily at Mass: “Are you not entertained? Is this not why you are here!?” That immortal line is from the movie “Gladiator”.

Sorry, I have to add one more by Arnold Schwarzenegger, battling an alien and yells: “Here I am! Do it! Kill me! Kill me! Here I am! Do it now!” Then he adds: “Get to the chopper!” That’s from everyone’s favorite movie “Predator”. So, that would be a great vacation for me: to enter into the story line of a great movie and repeat the lines, and pretend I am the hero.

In the gospel today, Jesus invites a scholar of the law to step into a story too, and see whose part he would take. Jesus tells the familiar parable of the Good Samaritan, who was the lead character who stopped to help the man beaten half-dead. Of course, a priest and Levite both pass by on the other side of the road, ignoring the poor man. Jesus asks, in effect, who is the hero of the story? The legal scholar answers, “The one who treated him with mercy.” And then Jesus adds: “Go and do likewise.”

In other words, just like I can quote Tim Robbins and Humphrey Bogart and even Arnold Schwarzenegger, and imagine I can do what they do in the movies, so Jesus tells the man to imitate the love and compassion of the story he just heart. Why? Well, because when we become part of the story, we can sympathize with the characters. We cry at their failures, and we rejoice at their triumphs. That is the power of great story-telling: it makes us more human.

St. Augustine put a different twist on the story of the Good Samaritan. He interpreted it as an allegory, the dramatic story of human history. How so? He suggested that the man who was robbed and beaten was allegorically “Adam”. “Jerusalem” in the story is the Garden of Eden, which Adam had left. The thieves and robbers who attacked him are the devil and his fallen angels who stripped him, that is, robbed him of his immortality by persuading him to sin, which is spiritually the state of being “half-dead”.

The priest and Levite represent the Old Testament priesthood and ministry which did not actually help anyone to be saved. Jesus himself is the Good Samaritan who binds and heals the man’s wounds which are both physical and spiritual. The “oil” is the sacrament of Anointing of the Sick, and the “wine” symbolized the Eucharist, the wine of Jesus’ Precious Blood. The “inn” where the man recuperates is the Church, where we pilgrims find food, shelter and rest on our way home to heaven.

The point of Augustine’s interpretation was to show how Jesus wants to step into our story. Jesus never went to Universal Studios to take one of those movie rides. But when he was born a Baby in Bethlehem, he entered our human story and changed “human history” into “salvation history”. By stepping into our story, he not only sympathizes with us, he heals us, he feeds us, and he even dies for us. When you step into someone’s story, it makes you more human, and that is what happened to Jesus: he became human to save us.

My friends, today take a minute to think about the people’s stories you have stepped into. The stories of your parents, those of your children, the great dramas of your friends’ lives. And many of you have played an important role in the story of Immaculate Conception Church. These stories would not be the same without you in it. Or, maybe like the priest and the Levite in Jesus’ parable, you have side-stepped some people’s stories. Sometimes we ignore people or avoid them and stay out of their stories. But when we do, it becomes hard to sympathize and understand them. They grow distant and we become detached from them. And we become less human.

But also give God thanks for the people who have been the “supporting cast” in your own story, where YOU are the hero, of course! But really, the hero of our story should be Jesus. If we can see our personal and individual stories clearly and honestly, as it truly is, we will discover we are in reality that man half-dead and in need of rescuing and recovery. We need the Church and her sacraments on our pilgrimage home to heaven.

Praised be Jesus Christ!

Faith Sandwiches

Seeing how faith flavors our whole life

07/05/2022

MT 9:18-26 While Jesus was speaking, an official came forward, knelt down before him, and said, “My daughter has just died. But come, lay your hand on her, and she will live.” Jesus rose and followed him, and so did his disciples. A woman suffering hemorrhages for twelve years came up behind him and touched the tassel on his cloak. She said to herself, “If only I can touch his cloak, I shall be cured.” Jesus turned around and saw her, and said, “Courage, daughter! Your faith has saved you.” And from that hour the woman was cured. When Jesus arrived at the official’s house and saw the flute players and the crowd who were making a commotion, he said, “Go away! The girl is not dead but sleeping.” And they ridiculed him. When the crowd was put out, he came and took her by the hand, and the little girl arose. And news of this spread throughout all that land.

Do you ever have cravings for a really tasty sandwich? Maybe you feel a hankering for a BLT, or a French Dip sandwich; others prefer a good Patty Melt, or a hearty Meatball sandwich, and still others want a simple PBJ or really popular these days are avocado toast sandwiches. Now that I have you in the mood for a good sandwich, do you know where the best sandwich shop is in the world? You will find it right here in the Bible, in the four gospels, especially the Gospel of Mark. St. Mark makes the best sandwiches in the world, better than French Dip, Reubens or Avocado Toast. Mark makes “faith sandwiches”, and he taught his secret recipe to Matthew, Luke and John, too.

What is a faith sandwich? Well, you will find these sandwiches most often in Mark, but you also find it in today’s gospel from Matthew 9. As you know, a typical sandwich has two pieces of bread: one on top and another on the bottom. The meat or other ingredients are in the middle. And like all sandwiches, the meat in the middle gives flavor to the rest of the sandwich, and make even the bread taste better. So, too, with the faith sandwich. The gospel writer begins with a certain story, then the story is interrupted by a seemingly strange segue, and then he returns to finish the original story. The bread on top and bottom are the original story and the meat in the middle is the segue story.

Did you notice the faith sandwich in the gospel this morning? Matthew – Mark’s sous chef – starts telling the story about an official whose daughter has just died and asks Jesus to come heal her. That story is the top slice of the bread. Then Matthew inserts the meat in the middle by interrupting that story with the woman suffering from hemorrhages for 12 years. With great faith, she just touches the tassel of Jesus’ robe and is healed. The meat of the sandwich is her great faith.

And then Matthew returns to the original story with Jesus arriving at the little girl’s home and the people ridiculing him when he said she is only asleep and not dead. Can you see the faith sandwich, or better, taste it? By juxtaposing the stories of the woman with great faith and the people of little faith, St. Matthew is teaching us the importance of and the difference that faith makes. Faith, like the meat in the middle, gives flavor to the whole sandwich: the woman’s faith on the road was an example to the lack of faith of the people in the house. And that is how you make a faith sandwich.

My friends, would like you like to learn the secret recipe and make your own faith sandwich? I am convinced that our whole life can be a huge faith sandwich. How so? Recently, two of our church staff members have had babies. One is named Juan Antonio, and the other is Oliver. Sometimes I carry the babies around the office and we pray the rosary together. And that immediately puts the baby to sleep, like the rosary does to many of us.

But as I walk and look at these babies, I have noticed how they share a lot of the same traits as elderly adults. Babies and the elderly take naps, they need other people to help them eat and change clothes and pick them up and place them in a seat. Sometimes both wear diapers (sorry about that). Juan Antonio is big enough to be put in a contraption where he can stand and move his legs. I asked his mother Cecilia what that contraption is called, and she said, “a walker”. See any similarities between babies and the elderly? Babies don’t drive cars and some elderly people should not drive cars either.

My point is that our years as a baby and our years as elderly are the two sides of bread of our lives. And the meat is in the middle and gives flavor to the whole sandwich. So ask yourself today: what am I filling the sandwich of my life with? Is the meat in the middle of our life a lot of materialistic, worldly goods, which would make a decent sandwich after all. Or, is the meat in the middle of my life layers and layers of faith, piled high with prayers, penance, peace and patience? In other words, we can learn from the sandwich shop of the gospels how to make a great faith sandwich of our whole life. That's the best sandwich in the world.

Today as we celebrate Independence Day here in the United States, you may not get to eat a sandwich, or maybe you might. But we still may have a few quiet minutes to think about important things like the blessings of freedom and the blessings of our faith. And maybe you might even find yourself hankering for a really good faith sandwich.

Praised be Jesus Christ!

A Patriotic Mood

How my family fell in love with the United States

07/02/2022

Is 66:10-14c Thus says the LORD:  Rejoice with Jerusalem and be glad because of her,  all you who love her;  exult, exult with her, all you who were mourning over her!  Oh, that you may suck fully of the milk of her comfort, that you may nurse with delight at her abundant breasts! For thus says the LORD: Lo, I will spread prosperity over Jerusalem like a river, and the wealth of the nations like an overflowing torrent. As nurslings, you shall be carried in her arms, and fondled in her lap;  as a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you;  in Jerusalem you shall find your comfort. When you see this, your heart shall rejoice and your bodies flourish like the grass; the LORD's power shall be known to his servants.

It may surprise you to know that not all immigrants immediately fall in love with America. Obviously, some do, who come here fleeing dire and desperate circumstances and they cannot wait to set foot on American soil, and kiss the ground. But not everyone arrives like that. This is July 4th weekend, and everyone is in a patriotic mood, so let me share with you how my family fell in love with America, and got into the patriotic mood ourselves. It was not love at first sight, but we very much love this land today.

My family immigrated to the United States in 1976, when I was seven years old, my older brother was nine, and my little sister was five. That makes me the well-adjusted middle child. My parents’ original intention in immigrating to the U.S. was not to settle here forever or permanently. Like many immigrants from developing countries, like India, people would leave to work overseas in foreign first-world countries and make a lot of money. After several years of hard work, saving every penny, and never taking a vacation, we fully planned to go back “home” to India. That was Plan A.

But things started to change when we went back to India as teenagers for a two-week vacation. It was summer time, the temperature was always above 110 degrees and not every place we visited had air-conditioning, very few did. All the chocolate ice cream in New Delhi can’t keep you cool when it’s 115 degrees and humid! At several intervals the three kids had meltdowns faster than the ice cream, and we cried: “We want to go home!”

It suddenly hit my parents that while they considered India their “home”, the three children fully felt the United States was our “home”. So, Plan A became Plan B, that is, my parents would live here in the United States until they retired. Once they had plenty of retirement funds, they would build a comfortable home in India and return there to live their golden years. That was Plan B.

And so, my brother grew up and became an engineer and later a businessman. My sister studied communication and English and works for the Church. And you know most of my story. Eventually, my siblings started having children: my brother has 4 and my sister has 5, because they were trying to pick up my slack. And of course, there is nothing better than grandkids for grandparents. Grandchildren are their whole world, and they would move half-way around the world to be with them.

And that’s when it hit my parents again: why would they want to live in India while their precious grandchildren were growing up here in the United States? They realized that Plan B needed to become Plan C, and finally they accepted that America was their true and lasting home. And they would one day be laid to rest in American soil, their homeland. This July 4th weekend I will go to watch fireworks at my parents’ home in Springdale. And my family feels as patriotic as everyone else. But for us patriotism was a process.

If you study the Scriptures closely, you can notice a process of patriotism unfolding in those pages, from Genesis to Revelation. Throughout the Old Testament the Chosen People felt a deep patriotism for the land of Israel, the Promised Land. They never felt it more keenly than when they were in Exile, like my parents felt exiled and longed to go home to India when we first came to the U.S.

But in the New Testament, Jesus teaches his followers that the real Promised Land is in heaven, not on earth. In other words, the Promised Land of Palestine needed to change into the Promised Land of Paradise. Plan A of the Old Testament had to become Plan B of the New Testament. The people of the Bible had to go through a process of patriotism until they finally saw heaven as their true home.

My friends, where are you in that process of patriotism. What do I mean? Well, our true homeland is not America, but the Catholic Church, and the Church is heaven’s embassy on earth. Some people come to the Catholic Church desperate to reach its shores and feel like kissing the ground when they become Catholic. Just think about the excitement of new converts on Easter and the joy they feel to receive Holy Communion and Confirmation.

But for most of us it is a long, slow process of letting go of all our ties to earth and its excitements and desire to go home to heaven more than live on earth, like my parents gradually loved America more than India. Sometimes we want to be more American than be Catholic. But St. Paul was at the end of the process of patriotism when he said: “For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain…My desire is to depart and to be with Christ, for that is far better” (Phil 1:21, 23).

Where are you in that process of patriotism? As we shoot fireworks, spend time with family, enjoy and extra day of vacation, and give God thanks for this great land, don’t forget where your true homeland is.

Praised be Jesus Christ!